Make Me Bad
by Starchick
Summary: I've got the sequel up. Very sad E+T, ppl. The worst kind of pain is to love someone, but not be able to be with them. Mild swearing. And at least 21 reviews needed for a happier sequel! ^~ R&R please!
1. Default Chapter

Okay, I'm not that hopeless anymore to know that although Eriol attacks Sakura a lot  
of the time, he really is helping her out by helping her to change the Clow Cards into  
Sakura Cards. I've finally learned all about THAT at last ^^*. But suppose he really  
WAS evil. I mean, he certainly does have the makings of coming off that way, right? And  
suppose a certain favourite girl of his just happened to fall under his spell...Yes people,  
this is an ExT. It's for Megori's contest.  
  
  
Disclaimer: I do not own Card Captor Sakura or the song 'Make Me Bad' or the song  
'Chained to You'. They belong to Korn, Savage Garden, and Clamp. And  
people, I must tell you now that I'm not a big fan of Korn, but I just   
thought the song fit with the fic. Or the song title, anyway.  
  
  
  
  
MAKE ME BAD  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
And when you looked into my eyes  
Felt a sudden sense of urgency  
Fascination cast a spell   
And you became more than just a mystery  
And I think about you all the time  
Is it fate, is it my destiny?  
  
  
~Savage Garden- Chained to You  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
~Flashback~  
  
  
  
"I'm sorry again, really, Sakura-chan," Tomoyo apologized to her best friend for what  
had to be the 17th time that day. Sakura simply laughed it off. "Oh come on, Tomoyo-  
chan, I can survive a cheerleading practice without you videotaping me, you know,"  
she reassured the purple-haired girl, rolling her eyes. "Besides, what would I complain  
about? It's just one less shot of me dropping my baton on my head recorded for all  
eternity."  
  
"Oh, how the world SHALL suffer," Tomoyo admonished sarcastically, sending both of  
them into hysterical giggles. Just another carefree example of how close they were to  
the other, almost anything could make them laugh whenever they were together.   
Tomoyo would do anything, anything at all for Sakura, and she knew it was the other  
way around too...and though sometimes, she admitted that she hoped for more, what  
she shared with her green-eyed friend now was enough for her.  
  
Now, Sakura pushed her in the direction of the music room. "Well hurry up, Tomoyo-  
chan, you're going to be late for choir practice. And we all know Tomoeda's little  
golden girl can never do anything wrong."  
Tomoyo slapped her friend on the arm and stuck her tongue out at her. "Oh shut up,  
Sakura-chan, and get over to cheerleading practice. You wouldn't want to deprive  
our dear Li Syaoran of watching you from soccer practice for a whole hour, would you?"  
  
She quickly slipped into the music room while Sakura was still reddening in embarrasment  
and didn't have the time to blow up at her.  
  
For some reason, the choir practice just didn't draw her attention the same way as it  
usually did, which was very odd. Music was one of her most favourite things, beside  
photography of course. Maybe she could already feel something stirring in the air.  
Maybe there was going to be another challenge for Sakura to face that night, and she  
was being forewarned about it, so that she could make a brand new costume.  
  
Whatever it was, Tomoyo didn't have time just then to dwell on it, because choir  
practice ended earlier than usual. Because of her spacing out during practice, Tomoyo  
quickly asked permission to remain in the music room and rehearse before the music  
teacher even had the chance to berate her about not paying attention.  
  
Now, the music room was quiet, deserted...the way she enjoyed most things, actually.  
Much better concentration that way. Making sure no one was around, she pressed the  
play button on the stereo and began singing to the music, singing the songs on her  
music sheets, the way they were instructed to do. That afternoon, the music teacher  
had been worried about the absent way Tomoyo had sung the songs, considering she  
was the best singer in the whole choir. She had to fix that little mistake.  
  
After a while, Tomoyo turned off the tape recorder, drifting over to the window.   
Cheerleading practice was still going, as was the boys soccer team practice. The 2  
different groups were sharing the same field, since there was a flood problem with the  
other soccer field, and Tomoyo had to giggle at the antics that were going on 2 stories  
below her. The usual. Sakura waving energetically at Syaoran, whose face would now   
take away the dignity of the ripest apple. Chiharu glaring daggers across the field at  
Takashi -- the 2 had been in a fight for the past week or so.  
  
Without meaning to in the slightest, her violet gaze suddenly traveled over the other  
players to land on Hiiragizawa Eriol. The new kid in class, who already had over half  
the female population of the senior division of Tomoeda Elementary after him. It was that   
'new guy' thing, that was the conclusion Tomoyo always drew.   
  
Suddenly, Eriol leaned his head back -- and his navy cerulean eyes locked with Tomoyo's.  
Tomoyo gasped, her eyes widening. The intensity of his gaze....it was all she could  
see, swimming, no, DROWNING in the deep pools of a dark ocean on an endless night.  
It repelled her; a warning was screaming in her head to turn away. Yet at the same  
time, it drew her, almost physically pulling her toward him. She felt helpless to recoil..  
  
And then just as suddenly, Eriol broke the contact, turning back to the soccer practice  
at hand as the ball hit his foot. Syaoran slid right in front of him, knocking the ball  
away and tripping Eriol, making them both tumble to the ground, which was supposed  
to be a penalty move and Syaoran knew it. But he never had liked Hiiragizawa Eriol  
much -- didn't trust him.  
  
Tomoyo stumbled a few steps back from the window, breathing hard, her eyes still  
wide. It had taken all her mental strength to pull away from Eriol's gaze; for some   
reason, she felt as if she'd had a very narrow and lucky escape.   
  
What was that? Tomoyo thought frantically, leaning back against the piano in exhaustion.   
She stared out the window, almost afraid to look back down at the green field, afraid  
that she'd find the blue-haired boy staring back at her again. What had been that power  
in his gaze? The way it had repelled her almost to the point of being terrified, and at  
the same time drew her like nothing else. She had never felt that way before.  
  
Tomoyo shook her head firmly, and grabbed her backpack. It must have been my  
imagination, she told herself insistantly, heading toward the door of the music room;  
she'd had enough practice. It's because I didn't get much sleep last night, I was up  
late watching my tapes of Sakura-chan, and editing the new ones.  
  
Of course that had been the reason, she realized in slight relief. It was the only reason  
there was -- after all, Eriol wasn't a super being or anything. He was Sakura's friend,  
and he'd even hung out with both her and Sakura, as well as Syaoran. She was just  
being melodramatic; according to Sakura, she did that a lot.  
  
Apparently, in the few minutes between Tomoyo's backing away from the window and  
her getting down to the soccer field, both team practices had finished. The field was  
deserted; of course, Sakura wouldn't have found any reason to stay behind. Tomoyo  
had told her that choir practice was supposed to be shorter that day. She had probably  
just walked home with Rika or even Syaoran (if he hadn't found some excuse to run  
away quickly).  
  
Sighing, Tomoyo hitched her backpack more securely onto her back and started in the  
direction of her house. I guess I'll just call her tonight or something, she thought.  
  
Tomoyo had been almost positive that the soccer field HAD been deserted, and even  
more positive that nobody had been behind her. He was just...there, all of a sudden,  
she hadn't even heard him come up. All she heard was his voice, spoken in that   
completely easy, almost eerily smooth voice of his.  
  
"Hello, Daidouji-san," he greeted.  
Tomoyo jumped almost ten feet into the air, whirling around as she backed away slightly.  
"Hiiragizawa-kun!" she said, or more accurately, squeaked.   
"Are you gonna run away?" he asked in a teasing tone, and Tomoyo suddenly couldn't  
understand why she was feeling so nervous around him. This was only Eriol.  
  
She laughed, although it came out a little breathlessly and high. "Of course not," she  
replied. "I just...I didn't think anyone was behind me. I didn't even know you were   
still here, really, I thought I was the last student left."  
  
A slow smirk suddenly spread across his face, and he stepped closer to her, leaning in  
slightly. "But Daidouji-san, you did know I was here," he said in a low voice, though  
still in his smooth manner, which gave his voice an almost hypnotic quality. "You saw  
me here, during practice."  
  
Tomoyo was distinctly aware of the telltale warming of her face...but only distinctly.  
Somehow, she was more aware of him.  
"W-well, I..I just figure that you'd gone right home, just like everyone else," she  
stammered lamely.  
  
He turned his gaze on her full out..again. "Sure, whatever you say," he said quietly,  
with a smile, the kind of smile that gave her the feeling that he knew something she  
didn't know.   
  
And for the second time that day, she fell victim to the intensity of his gaze, too far  
gone to even question why she was feeling this way all so suddenly -- just earlier this  
afternoon, she had asked to borrow an eraser from him without even a moment's thought.  
  
Blinking slowly, she somehow brought down the power of the moment, feeling herself  
stumble backward dangerously, although she still felt removed from herself.  
And he caught her before she fell, so great, now she was even closer to him.  
  
He whispered something in her ear then, that almost reached her through the haze  
in her mind. "Actually Tomoyo, I really would run away now."  
  
Her eyes widened in surprise and confusion, but then he stepped back, and things  
became almost normal. Almost.  
  
"By the way, Tomoyo-san..you can call me Eriol if you wish," he said with an easy  
smile. Then, walking past me, "Well, I've got to get home. I'll see you, okay?"  
She simply nodded instinctively, watching him head down the darkening street. Then  
he disappeared into the oncoming night.  
  
  
  
~Flashback Ends~  
  
  
  
~Tomoyo's POV~  
  
  
  
And I know that it was from that moment on, a little over a week ago, I became another   
statistic among some other 80 girls in school. Hopelessly in love with Hiiragizawa Eriol.  
At least, I was pretty sure that this was love. Then again, it didn't exactly make sense.  
  
For one thing, how could he be a friend to me one minute, and then the next be almost  
the only thing that filled my mind 24/7? For another, maybe the only reason I had fallen  
for him was because I hadn't seen him since that day that he completely caught me  
off guard, and swept me to another reality that I didn't think I could ever escape  
from. But so hard?  
  
Then again, nothing about this whole thing made sense in the least.  
At first, I had thought that all these other girls had been attracted to him because he  
was the new guy in school. It had happened to Syaoran too.  
  
But there was something about Eriol, something unnatural. I didn't even need magical  
powers to realize that, and I didn't think anyone who had fallen for him did either. It  
was just the aura he gave out...no wonder Syaoran didn't really trust him -- he'd been   
onto something after all. Even though he hadn't trusted Mizuki-sensei either, and she'd   
ended up helping Sakura, he had still been right about her having powers. If there's one   
thing I've learned, it's to trust Syaoran's sense of power.  
  
Still, Syaoran's sense of trust wasn't exactly the best to go by...and I wanted to keep  
on believing that he just didn't like Eriol because he kept flirting with Sakura.   
  
Yet I couldn't pretend that I hadn't felt what I'd felt that day. Yes, I had been almost  
magnetically attracted to him..the power of his gaze! God. And then there was the  
fact that a little voice in me had been telling me to get away from him before...but  
before what? And why had he singled me out? Yeah, I was sure that my falling for him  
was entirely his fault. I sighed; none of this added up.  
  
It was soo confusing. And where had he been for the past week? He hadn't been in  
school at all, and apparently he'd been missing soccer practice as well. Of course,  
Syaoran didn't exactly appear too displeased with the fact. All I knew was that...that  
I needed to see him again. It was becoming a constant crush on my soul every time  
his seat remained empty day after day...maybe something had happened to him?  
  
Apparently, Sakura was worried too. "I wonder where Eriol-kun's been lately?" she  
mentioned to Syaoran that Wednesday morning, turning around in her seat to speak.  
"He's been away for a really, really long time, and he's never missed a single day of  
class before this, either."  
  
Syaoran merely crossed his arms and glared out the window with his usual manner of  
annoyance and indifference. I quickly put my head down, pretending to be deeply  
immersed in an assignment due tomorrow. I knew that Sakura was generally talking to  
both of us, which was why I did this; every time Eriol's name was even mentioned  
lately, I'd been feeling something funny in my heart, almost as if it was floating, and  
apparently it would show on my face, since people would continually ask me if I was  
feeling alright or if I had a fever. This was just bad...what was WRONG with me? It  
couldn't be possible to fall THIS hard for someone...I didn't think even Syaoran had it  
this bad for Sakura, and you know that wasn't good.  
  
I absently began drawing little scribbles around the edges of the paper, remembering  
my conversation with him for the umpteenth time. He said he'd let me call him Eriol-  
kun...just like Sakura did. Then I must be special to him....  
I suddenly frowned, remembering that he'd said one other important thing...but what  
was it? Strange, I remembered it as a warning...but against what?  
  
I sighed despondantly again, and naturally, my best friend just had to comment this  
time.   
"Are you okay, Tomoyo-chan?" Sakura asked, studying me. Ducking my head lower in  
a hasty attempt to hide my now-reddening face, I looked up and smiled at her, rather  
shakily. "I'm okay." I don't know why I even bothered. She knew almost instantly that  
something was up, I could see it in the way her frown deepened.  
  
But luckily, before Sakura could outwardly condemn me for lying, a distraction came in.  
Although, I don't think it was the most welcome distraction for me right then.  
The morning announcements had just finished, and Terada-sensei was just standing  
up to begin class...when he walked in.  
  
I actually gasped, out loud; it was purely a work of the stars that neither Sakura nor  
Syaoran seemed to hear me. And I went rigid in my seat.  
Eriol handed a note to Terada-sensei, and began talking to him about something, I   
couldn't hear what. Or maybe I just WOULDN'T hear what; I was sure I would've been  
able to hear him fine had I been able to block the sudden whirl of nonsensical thoughts  
that began instantly swirling around in my head.  
  
Here was another paradox. Just less than 3 minutes ago, I'd been aching to see Eriol  
again, and now that he was less than 5 feet away, I wanted nothing more than to   
run as far away as I could, even if I had to crash the windows of the classroom to  
escape. And this definetly wasn't normal.  
  
This wasn't at all what I'd expected to feel like when he came back. I'd at least thought  
that the worst that could happen would be the feeling in me would intensify a little --  
as much as I hated the feeling, I could live with that. But forget intensify -- the  
emotions magnified by a thousandfold, causing my breath to come out in uneven little  
gasps and my hands to tightly clench themselves in my lap. I was sure I was about  
to break all the bones in my hand, the way they were fisted so tightly.  
  
And on top of that...I was still feeling the little trill of fear, as if I was toying with  
something way more dangerous than fire.   
  
"Well, it's good to have you back, Hiiragizawa," Terada-sensei admonished. "Now if you  
would please take your seat before class can begin...and before Yamazaki can  
hyperventilate.." He cast a wry look at Yamazaki, who was almost bouncing up and  
down in his seat with glee, overjoyed at having Eriol back so he would now have a  
partner in crime again. Scary thought, and as if I didn't have enough of those to deal  
with right now.  
  
I forced myself to calm down as Eriol came and sat behind me; it wasn't easy. After  
over a week of thinking about him, thinking about the way he had cast a spell over me,  
and to have him sitting so close just now...  
  
As history class began, I kept my head firmly glued to the book, for once actually  
getting interested in the lesson. Anything to keep me from having to look around, to  
have any reason to turn around and look at--  
  
Terada-sensei's history speech ended, and the work period began. As I pulled a clean  
sheet out of my binder, I suddenly froze -- Eriol's eraser. I had borrowed it from him  
the day I had seen him last..THAT day..and now it was sitting in my binder; I'd never  
gotten a chance to give it back to him.  
  
I bit down on my lip. And now I had no excuse for not giving it back to him, since he  
was right behind me, and the eraser was right here. I took a deep breath, before   
suddenly coming to my senses and realizing how stupid I was being. I just had to turn  
around and give him the eraser. It wasn't as if we could really do anything right in the  
middle of history class.  
  
Squeezing my eyes shut briefly, I seized the eraser and turned sharply around in my  
seat before I could give myself another chance to hesitate. "Eriol-kun, here's your  
eraser, I forgot to give it back to you..." I trailed off as his eyes rose from his worksheet  
to me, with that same knowing smile.  
  
"So you finally got your courage up, hmm?" he said softly, smoothly...and I suddenly  
had an overwhelming urge to shiver. I was able to stop myself from doing that, but   
with all the effort it took, I forgot to try and put some control over my blushing.  
Therefore...  
  
My face flamed, and I quickly looked down at his desk. "I'm sorry...I was just..I was  
trying to decide whether to interrupt you or not," I lied horribly. "I thought to give it  
back to you after class, but I was afraid I might forget."  
  
He continued to smile, although I think it turned into a light smirk. He took the eraser  
from my hand; this time, I couldn't stop a chill from running down my spine when his  
skin came into contact with my own. But the chill...was it from exhiliration? ...Or fear?  
  
"Thank you, Tomoyo-san," he said. "And by the way, I'm glad you remembered."  
My cheeks flared again as I realized he wasn't talking about the eraser. I had called him  
Eriol-kun like he'd told me to..and so easily, I hadn't even thought about it.  
  
I quickly whirled around in my seat before anything else could happen; so much for  
nothing happening in the middle of history class. I felt as if I'd gone on the monster of  
all killer roller coasters...felt as if I'd just had a close encounter with a devil, with an  
angel...and boy, I was messed up. I still couldn't get over this; I was beginning to feel  
Eriol had cast a spell over me. I knew for a fact that this was not normal, and he  
certainly seemed able to cast an enchantment.  
  
What I felt for him, around him...I wasn't completely oblivous. I knew that one thing I  
definetly wasn't around him was comfortable. The last 2 times I'd come into contact  
with him, I always felt that I had just had a narrow escape...I instinctively knew that  
he was dangerous, that he was wickedly un-innocent, that he definetly was anything  
but normal. All these things should have made me run away screaming, which I usually  
had a strange desire to do...but it was the irresistable enticing intoxication I always  
felt that forced me to stay. No questions asked about which emotion was stronger.  
  
But what WAS it about him? What was he...?  
I suddenly remember what had caused me to want to shiver just moments earlier. The  
fact that....he seemed to have read my mind. I had been sitting with my back to him  
when I'd been undecided about handing him the eraser...yet he'd still known what I  
was doing. Of course, I didn't put reading minds past him anymore. And then I   
remembered just what it was he'd said to me that day over a week ago.  
  
("Actually Tomoyo, I really would run away now.")  
  
And I shivered yet again.  
  
  
  
~*~*~  
  
  
  
"Hey, what did you guys get on that Japanese test?" Chiharu asked the group in  
general as we sat around the cherry blossom tree in the school yard at lunch. We were  
all there..well, all minus one person. One certain person...  
  
Syaoran refused to give his mark, so was naturally furious when Yamazaki told the rest  
of us it was a 59 percent.   
"I don't see what you're complaining about," Yamazaki told him. "You beat me, I got a  
53."  
"Well then, I kicked both your butts -- 67 percent here," Chiharu taunted with a smirk,  
flashing her test.  
  
"Don't inflate your ego too much, Chiharu-chan, I wouldn't want to make such a big  
explosion when I pop it," Naoko told her friend with a grin. "75 percent."  
"Hey, same here," exclaimed Rika. "I did much better than I thought I would; man, I  
thought I would've failed."  
  
"So did I," Sakura told her. "But I aced it, 85 percent. Okay, A-minus maybe, but still."  
She turned to me, apparently noticing that I hadn't said anything yet, I was still picking  
at my lunch, which was still basically intact; I hadn't eaten anything. "What about you,  
Tomoyo-chan?" Sakura asked.  
  
I glanced up at her with a mild look of confusion on my face, but Chiharu broke in,   
thankfully.  
"As if anyone here doesn't know what the answer to THAT will be," she giggled. "Really,  
Sakura-chan, we're talking about Tomoyo-chan here."  
  
Sakura dug into my backpack and snatched out my Japanese test. "She got a 99!" she  
exclaimed. "Look, the only mistake she made was a little punctuation error."  
I just smirked; I knew how to handle this. It was all in everyday stride. "That's right,  
people," I said breezily. "You can all kneel before your queen now."  
  
They all laughed; even Syaoran managed a snicker. "That's our angel Tomoyo-chan,"  
said Sakura, giving me a one armed hug.  
Angel..., I thought suddenly. I had always been considered an angel, always perfect,  
to almost everyone. Really, it was only Sakura, Syaoran, and Li Meiling who had   
noticed that I wasn't always so innocent. But I didn't mind. Of course, nobody would  
think of blaming the good girl.  
  
But if I was an angel, would I have fallen for Eriol...?  
  
Speaking of which..  
"Where's Eriol?" I had to ask, trying to seem as casual as possible. With him involved,  
it wasn't so easy..  
"He had to talk to Terada-sensei," Yamazaki explained. "Probably because he's missed  
so many classes. Shame, this would have been a perfect opportunity for him to help me  
explain about life in ancient Antarctica..."  
  
Chiharu held up her chopstick like a dagger. "If you even think of starting, Takashi-kun,"  
she threatened.  
  
Through this all, Sakura had been watching me with the most scrutinizing look I'd ever  
seen on her face, and she finally spoke up with what I knew she was going to say.  
"So Tomoyo-chan, when are you planning on telling us what's going on between you   
and Eriol-kun?" she asked teasingly.  
  
Okay, I had to play this completely in control... "I don't know what you're talking about,  
Sakura-chan."  
Syaoran and the others, by this time, were now putting their full attention on us;   
Syaoran was staring rather hard -- I guess he just didn't like the idea of me and Eriol  
together. Well, it was nice to know he cared anyway.  
  
"Yeah, Daidouji-san," he stated, still watching me searchingly. "Sakura and I heard  
your conversation with him this morning--"  
"Oh! Oh!" Chiharu suddenly squealed in excitement, also staring at me. "I was wondering  
why you were blushing this morning."  
"And he called you by your first name, too, and vice versa," Sakura said with a smile,  
watching me. I knew she was really enjoying this; for some reason, I felt a flash of  
annoyance.  
  
"Uh oh, does our dear Tomoyo-chan have a crush on Hiiragizawa-kun?" Rika asked,  
very straightforward she was being.  
I scowled, turning to Sakura. "Hey, you call him by his first name too," I countered with  
a smirk, watching as the tables turned. "Come to think of it, doesn't he do that too?"  
  
Sakura shrugged, but I didn't hear her excuse; maybe I shouldn't have said that, I   
thought, watching Syaoran glare at the ground as if he didn't plan to leave that spot  
until he'd mentally bored a hole straight through to the core of the earth.  
  
Mercifully, the subject had now switched to a new vampire book that Naoko was now  
reading. Something about a regular person falling deep in love with the vampire, and--  
  
My eyes shot wide, as I realized what Naoko was talking about. It was too much like  
my situation with Eriol...I suddenly felt that wild, inexplicable fear that I usually felt  
whenever I thought of Eriol, whenever he was near me...that sense of warning that  
would tell me that I should turn back now...  
  
Then I blinked, realizing once again how dumb I was being. Eriol wasn't a vampire. Great,  
next I would be expecting him to drink blood or something. Although, he sure did have  
the captivating characteristics of a vampire...   
I couldn't stay there anymore. Quickly jumping to my feet, I explained, "I'm sorry you  
guys, I have to go now. The music teacher said I should meet her for something extra  
to practice."  
  
Sakura looked upset. "But today is only a half day, Tomoyo-chan, it ends after lunch,"  
she complained. "We'll have to see you tomorrow."  
"Sorry," I apologized again. "I'll call you tonight, okay? See you guys."  
  
Thankfully, I escaped without further questions asked. Or maybe I had just run off to  
fast to give anybody a chance to ask questions. For sure, they couldn't have bought  
my music teacher story.  
  
I decided to leave school then, it was only a few minutes earlier. I don't know why I  
suddenly decided on it, I had never cut school in my life. But this didn't exactly count  
as cutting school, did it? I paused undecidedly under the tree that was closest to the   
school's boundary.  
  
But then, all thoughts of school, and whatever I was going to do, fled from my mind  
like deer fleeing a forest fire. They didn't even flee; more like got deleted, they   
disintegrated so fast. All because of one person. I felt him before he spoke.  
  
"Well, seems she isn't so innocent after all," Eriol said, from a branch in the tree. A  
branch pretty high up, I noticed as my head snapped up to look at him. I blinked,  
staring straight at him. Doing everything I could to avoid actually looking directly into  
his eyes; what a dangerous place to look.  
  
"How did you get all the way up there?" I asked, or croaked, more likely.  
Eriol jumped down from the tree -- straight down from the high branch he'd been on,  
and landed perfectly. I swear, I would have been convinced right then and there that  
he was definetly something else, if I hadn't seen Syaoran perform the same feat so  
many times.  
  
"I'm a good climber," he said evenly.  
The school bell rang, signalling the end of the day. Eriol glanced up toward the school,  
and then at me, the I-know-something-you-don't-know smile on his face again.   
"Well, you didn't skip school, at least," he said.  
  
I felt the sense of intoxication again, mingled with the fear, feeling the indecision as well.  
He suddenly smirked at me. "Are you going to scream this time, Tomoyo-san?" he  
asked, softly taunting me. It sounded incredibly sarcastic..and at the same time..that  
was ALWAYS the way it was with him, always sparking 2 different emotions from me.  
I really wondered then if he ever did this with any of the other girls that chased him.  
  
Realizing I hadn't replied to his question, I coloured up and looked at the grass. "No.."  
I murmured. He chuckled softly and stepped closer to me. "Maybe you should," he said  
quietly.  
This time, I definetly heard the warning clearly, and looked up at him quickly. He was  
right; any other sane person would have been screaming at the top of their lungs by  
now too...there was certainly something unnatural about him. Maybe I should be   
screaming too.  
  
But I didn't scream. No, instead, I just replied to him, glancing away from him as I leaned  
back against the tree. "Why?" I asked simply. "Do you want me to scream?"  
He blinked. I had surprised him; finally, score one for me.  
  
He smiled again, stepping very close to me and placing a flower in my hair. A plum  
blossom. "You're an angel, Tomoyo-san," he said lightly, smoothly.  
  
I felt the shudder go through me, at almost the same instant the irresistable flow   
passed through...and I knew that it was dangerous to be here alone with him. What  
passed through me as his fingers caressed my hair...it was BAD..but it was good too.  
Besides that, he had just pulled the flower out of nowhere. I hadn't seen a plum blossom  
around here in ages.  
  
I chanced a very daring glance into his eyes; big mistake. Whatever power I knew he  
had, I was trapped in it. Once again, that warning in me was screaming at me to get  
away now, to never see this boy again...the moment he had come to Tomoeda, some-  
thing dark had entered the town.  
  
But all this was registering from seemingly very far away. And maybe, I just wanted it  
to.  
  
"But you're not, are you?" I whispered, posed as more of a statement than a question.  
I pressed my back against the tree as if hoping to sink into it. A fruitless attempt. I was  
already trapped in place by what I saw in his eyes...the same way I had been trapped  
over a week ago. Except this time, there was nothing to distract him and motivate him  
to pull away. And I was too weak to do it myself. "You're bad, aren't you? You've got  
special powers, too."  
  
The slow smirk crossed his face. "I'm pleased you noticed. But what made you think so?"  
"A lot of things," I murmured, my gaze still locked with his evening sapphire one.   
A faint laugh came from him. "And are you a very innocent angel, Tomoyo-san?"  
It was a rhetorical question, and I shook my head; thankfully, he had somehow toned  
down the power of his eyes, and I was able to look down, my breath once again coming  
out in ragged little gasps.  
  
He smiled again, in an almost normal way, as he reset the flower in my head. "No, but  
you are still an angel," he said softly. Then, whispering as he leaned even closer, "It's  
not a bad thing."  
This time, I met him squarely in the eye, not caring what it would do to me; I really   
wanted to know. "You intrigue me, Eriol-kun. Should I be afraid?"  
Eriol paused, then nodded slowly. "Yes, Tomoyo. You should be very, very afraid."  
  
  
  
~*~*~  
  
  
  
"I can't handle this. I just can't," I muttered, pacing around my spacious bedroom that  
night, strangely keeping myself away from the dark corners. Strange because I had   
never been afraid of the dark, not even when I was a child. But after Eriol, I think I   
could learn to be afraid of almost anything.  
  
Yet I was still attached to him like a magnet to steel...  
  
Eriol was DANGEROUS, in the serious tense of the word. Way more so than any of the  
other girls at school knew; they thought that Eriol was simply a rebel, though how they  
figured that was beyond me. He almost always got straight A's, and got along well with  
the teachers... but it was his karma that gave off what he was. Although I still couldn't  
read it!  
  
This was serious, and painful. At the same time, I was pleased that I was the only girl  
who knew just how dangerous he was. And nothing did anything to decrease my   
attraction to him...  
  
"I can't control this," I mumbled out loud to the bedroom.  
There was a quick knock on the door, and then Takao-san, one of my bodyguards,  
poked her head in, giving me a strange look. "Are you alright, Tomoyo-sama?" she asked  
in concern.  
  
I quickly turned to face her, putting a happily neutral expression on my face. "Just fine,  
Takao-san," I told her cheerfully.   
She looked as if she didn't believe me, but apparently put the matter aside. "Well, there's  
a phone call for you downstairs, it's your friend."  
  
Sakura, I knew instantly, jumping slightly. I had almost forgotten that I'd promised to  
call her tonight. Or more likely, completely forgotten.  
Quickly taking the stairs 2 at a time, I dashed into the living room, which was luckily  
empty, and picked up the extension in there. "I've got it!" I shouted, waiting for the  
click to ensure that Sakura and I had complete privacy.  
  
"How're you doing, Tomoyo-chan?" my best friend asked brightly from the other side  
of the line.  
"I'm okay, Sakura-chan. I'm so sorry, I promised to call you tonight--"  
"It's alright," Sakura laughed it off. "And really, I didn't exactly call you for simple affairs.  
There's you-know-what going down at King Penguin Park."  
  
I gasped, finally getting my mind off of Hiiragizawa Eriol for the first time in a while. You-  
know-what meant a dark force. Another chance for Sakura to convert a Clow Card. I  
mentally raked through the new costumes I had made for Sakura. "I'll meet you there  
in 10," I said quickly, adding with a laugh, "You're gonna be the Princess of the Night  
tonight, Sakura-chan."  
  
  
  
~  
  
  
  
"And you're looking fab, Sakura-chan," I said enthusiastically, circling the auburn-gold-  
haired girl as I recorded her from all angles.  
Sakura looked down at her outfit with a scowl: a long-sleeved midnight dark billowy top  
decorated with tiny silk black ribbons and stopped just above her midriff, and tight dark  
shorts, which even had a holster where she could place her little wand. In her hair I  
had placed a dark tiara between her pigtails.  
  
"Tomoyo-chan, I look like that vampire from Naoko-chan's book," she complained. I just  
giggled. "Hence the theme 'Princess of the Night', Sakura-chan," I pointed out, watching  
her through the lens of my camera. She really was cute...and I cared about her a lot..  
but..  
  
I found myself wondering just where my real feelings for Sakura had gone. Then I ended  
up at the only conclusion: they had disintegrated into nothing the instant that Eriol had  
looked at me in THAT way. Scary enough...  
  
I shook the thought away firmly, as a voice came from behind me. "You know, you 2 are  
really getting ridiculous."  
Syaoran came down from a tree and stepped out of the shadow, eyeing Sakura's   
costume in quiet amusement. Sakura glared at him. "Hey, it's not like I put her up to this,  
you know," she retorted.  
  
I crossed my arms and turned my head away haughtily. "Hmph! Just like a guy, no  
fashion sense at all," I said airily, brushing aside their rude comments.   
  
Sakura rolled her eyes to the moon above. "You know, maybe we should argue about  
this later, and get on with it. If I'm out too late, Touya-kun'll know for sure that some-  
thing is up, and Kero-chan'll get worried."  
"I suppose he wasn't worried enough to actually come along like he's supposed to?"  
Syaoran muttered. "Stupid lazy--"  
"Don't start that again, Syaoran-kun."  
  
I stopped listening to their banter as I tagged along behind them, lost in my thoughts.  
I frowned as I felt a breeze pass by -- there was something in the wind. By now, I'd  
had enough experience to know that it was the dark force. But what, I began to wonder,  
WAS the dark force? Who was causing it? They were bad, I knew that, and they were  
hurting my best friend Sakura to boot. If I ever found out who it was...  
  
"Tomoyo-chan?"  
I looked up, realizing I had stopped, and as a result, Sakura and Syaoran had stopped  
too, watching me in curious inquisitation.   
"Daidouji-san, are you alright?" Syaoran demanded.  
Sakura glared at him. "Of course she's not alright, she's fallen too hard for Hiiragizawa-  
kun," she told him.  
  
I gasped, staring at both of them. "What are you talking about?!"  
Sakura turned her emerald eyes on me. "We saw you talking to him after school today,  
Tomoyo-chan," she said in a softer voice. "I think it was pretty obvious--"  
"Sakura, I don't know what you think you're getting at," Syaoran cut her off, glaring at  
her, and then at me. "You were scared of him, that's all I saw. I don't know what she  
thinks she saw."  
  
My face burned up as I quickly looked down; they had exposed both of my major feelings  
in all this. And it annoyed me greatly, for some reason. I had never been annoyed at  
them in my whole life -- at least, never at Sakura. I had only been irritated with Syaoran  
last year, when he'd been making fun of my best friend.  
  
"You guys...I.."  
"Tomoyo-chan, you know you can tell us anything that's going on," Sakura persisted  
softly. "Even though I think Syaoran-kun is going slightly off the deep end about this,  
he's right, you DID look a little afraid...did something bad happen? Is something wrong?"  
"Did he do anything to you?" Syaoran demanded bluntly. Sakura gasped next to him.  
"Syaoran-kun! Eriol-kun would never--"  
  
The question echoed in my mind. Yes, he had done  
something to me, I said in my mind. But I could never tell them what.  
Syaoran never did trust him much...  
  
Taking a deep breath, I met both their gazes squarely, forcing a neutral expression. "No.  
He didn't do anything at all to me. It was not a big deal, he was just asking for some  
of the work he missed when he was absent."  
  
The answer seemed to satisfy Sakura; she always believed that I would never look her  
in the eye and lie to her. I had always believed so, too...but I wasn't EXACTLY lying,  
was I?  
  
Syaoran, on the other hand, wasn't at all convinced, judging from the way he continued  
to stare hard at me.   
"Uh, you guys...you DO realize that this dark force is still running free, right?" I pointed  
out to them, attempting to draw Syaoran's attention from me.  
  
Sakura gasped. "That's right! Come on, it's around the main section of the playground,  
by Emperor Penguin." She took off, and Syaoran quickly went after her. I hesitated for  
a moment, then followed them; weird, for some reason, I just suddenly felt as if I didn't  
belong there anymore.  
As if I was the enemy...  
  
Now THAT's crazy, I scolded myself. Sakura and I had been friends since the second  
grade, I would never betray her. Never...  
  
Staying in the bushes, I videotaped as Sakura and Syaoran took on the dark matter;  
something was killing the flowers in the gardens near the Emperor Penguin slide. It  
was something lethal; Sakura had to convert the Jump card to get out of the way,   
the Shot card to drive away the force, and the Flower card to repair the damage done.  
Another typical evening. I continued to videotape as she passed out in Syaoran's arms;  
wow, this evening is just one constant surprise after another, I thought sarcastically,  
finally flipping off the camcorder and wandering away to leave the 2 to themselves for  
a while.  
  
How right I was...and I was about to realize just how much so. I guess I should have  
known all along..  
  
I don't know what I was looking for, walking around the woods. Maybe I was just  
moving aimlessly, just to stay away from Sakura and Syaoran for a little while. Maybe  
I was subconsciously searching for the person who was causing all this trouble for  
my 2 best friends...if that was the case, at least I wasn't disappointed in my mission.  
Though I would have given anything to be.  
  
I was just about to head off back to the others; it had been half an hour already, surely  
that must have been enough time for them. I don't know why I stayed away so long;  
Sakura would probably be worried.   
  
Then I saw a glow through the trees...far away from where Sakura and Syaoran had  
been, so I knew it couldn't be them..but too close to their location to not have heard  
anything that had gone on. Of course, anyone who would be out here in the middle of  
the night was definetly...  
  
I stifled a gasp; it was THEM. I knew this instinctively, without even clearly seeing them.  
It was the ones who were causing all this to happen. I felt a flash of fury; I actually  
considered confronting them right there and then.  
  
But of course, that wasn't necessary.  
  
I think I literally froze, both inside and out, my body actually running cold, as I heard  
the voice. "Ruby Moon, Spinel Sun, go on home, alright? I'll catch up with you later."  
  
I didn't know who it was he was talking to, but I knew that voice anywhere. I had heard  
it so many times, in my dreams at night, in my thoughts through the day..in reality too.  
  
"Eriol.." I whispered, my eyes going huge in disbelief as shock coursed a lightning path  
through me.   
Of course, I should have realized. The danger I had always constantly felt around him,  
the power I had noticed in him...power enough to challenge my best friend, to cause  
all this to happen, to her..and yet I still couldn't believe it. Didn't WANT to believe it.  
  
("Should I be afraid?"   
"Yes. You should be very, very afraid.")  
  
He wasn't just wicked..he was--  
  
And then he spoke next, both the words and the voice sending a shiver through me,  
slightly violent. At least I had a legitimate reason to be this way.  
  
"Tomoyo."  
  
I gasped, taking a step back as he came into view, a smirk on his face. He didn't even  
seem the least bit surprised to see me there.  
"Fancy meeting you here," he said easily, as if only meeting me on the street. I said  
nothing, backing up against a tree.  
  
"So you saw. You know."  
I hesitated, then realizing he would see right through me if I lied, nodded. "Yes."  
He came close, and it was all I could do to keep a tremble from running through me.  
I wanted to scream at him, to slap him, hit him, hurt him for actually having the nerve  
to do this to my friend...  
  
"How could you?" Although planned to come out as an accusing shout, it actually came  
as a low demand. "You're her friend, she trusts you..you're probably the LAST person  
she would ever suspect...you're not just bad. You're evil. What are you, anyway? A  
magician, like them?"  
  
He didn't seem all that affected by my angry outburst. He tilted his head to the side  
a little, still watching me very closely. "Yes," he finally replied after a while. "I am a  
magician...much more powerful than they are, however. And yes..I am evil. I am very  
bad." This was said with a smirk, a wicked one. He paused, keeping his eyes on me.  
"Do you want to run away now, Tomoyo? Do you want to scream? I warned you before..  
and I believe you warned yourself too."  
  
Pressing myself further against the tree, shrinking away from him, I drew in a quick  
breath--  
--And then he reached out and caressed my cheek so softly and gently..and the scream  
which had been tearing at my throat just died away then. His finger moved to my mouth,  
silencing me.  
  
"It's too late now," he said softly.  
Yes, it was too late. If he was going to do something to me, it didn't matter...because  
I was already his. Even knowing what he was now, knowing what he'd been doing, what  
he was TRYING to do...the intrigue, the dizzying effects..resistance was futile. This   
feeling was still the dominant one over my fear.  
  
I drew my arms to my chest, still backing away from him as much as possible with my  
back still pressed against the tree, and he looked amused. "I'm not going to hurt you,  
Tomoyo," he told me.  
  
And for some reason, I believed him. Yet it did nothing to reassure me. I looked into his   
eyes, once again the dark cerulean being all that I could see. "What did you do to me?"  
I heard myself ask from very far away.   
He smiled casually. "I've done nothing to you."  
  
"Yes you have," I argued. "You're making me feel this way...you singled me out from all  
the other girls..what made me so special?" I think a small sob had just escaped from me.  
  
Eriol shook his head. "Yes Tomoyo. You drew me more than any other girl at school had  
ever done..more than any girl in my life has done. But the only one who has done   
anything is you...I fell in love with you. Despite how opposite you and I were...and I'm  
starting to think that the difference isn't so obvious. I don't know what it was, but you  
are very special.."  
  
He trailed off, and I slowly blinked as he paused, still in a daze. The knowing smirk came  
back to his face, and I was sure I was about to pass out right then. But this couldn't  
be natural; love wasn't supposed to be like this. I had always heard that love was  
supposed to be warm and sweet...not constantly on the edge, and wildly dangerous,  
while enjoying it like nothing else. He HAD to have done this...  
  
He read my mind. "I meant what I said, Tomoyo, I've done nothing to you. I warned you,  
and you warned yourself...but something still drew you to me. And my power had nothing  
to do with it." He smiled. "What was that something?"  
  
Why did he ask me that? I didn't know...did I?  
But I hadn't cared about his hurting Sakura, hadn't cared about him being who he was...  
he had intrigued me, but if he said that it wasn't his magic that had drawn me to him..  
then...  
  
I knew. I think I had known all along. Maybe this wasn't exactly the classic case of love,  
but it was love all the same...because I just wanted to be with him, and I didn't even  
care about anything else...  
But Sakura is my best friend, argued that voice in me. It was now screaming shrilly at  
me to get away from him, to run away from this place as fast as I could and not look  
back once, before something terrible happened, before I completely lost my sanity...  
  
I suddenly felt his hand on my arm, and suddenly, his voice was softly in my ear. "I  
love you, Tomoyo." My eyes fluttered closed as I heard those words. Of everyone after  
him, he had chosen me...I was special to him..  
He continued after a while. "Do you care about me too?"  
  
And terror just melted away like a warm, soothing liquid, and everything was just a  
soothing daze as he kissed me.   
"Yes Eriol," I whispered, stepping into the embrace of the devil's advocate, if there ever  
was one. And I didn't care. "I want to be with you. Make me bad, Eriol."  
  
  
  
  
  
  
What does it mean to you  
For me it's something I just do  
I want something  
I need to feel the sickness in you  
  
  
  
~Korn- Make Me Bad  
  
  
  
  
  
  
~Fin  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
I don't know HOW I came up with this story really, maybe it was because I had just  
done something bad myself, and just happened to be listening to Savage Garden.   
Whatever it was, here it is, ppl, my very first Eriol + Tomoyo fic. So now you know that   
any others I make won't be good, right? ^^* Don't worry, I might decide to spare you all   
the trauma. Email me at starviewcom@hotmail.com (I LUV emails ^_^), to tell me what   
you thought of this, okay? Cyaz!  
  
P.S. Yes, I think this is gonna be the end of this story, no sequels. Sorry if I left everyone  
hanging, but...=p I've got no other ideas 


	2. My Sacrifice

Okay, this is the sequel to 'Make Me Bad', and I know I said I wasn't going to write  
one ^^*, but inspiration hit very suddenly, and then I realized that it WAS kind of   
mean to leave everyone hanging where I did last time. So now, here it is: Eriol loves  
Tomoyo more than anything...but that can be the greatest danger of all to her.  
Almost entirely in Eriol's POV this time, so we can tell what's going on in the mind of  
the mastermind ^~ This is for Ciircee (thanks so much for beta-reading this ^^),  
Fallon and Sakura, for all their support and actually thinking the first story was good  
and prodding me to write this one. And to everyone else who reviewed/emailed last   
time and wanted a sequel, it's for you too! **Hugz 2 all** Enjoy! ^_^  
  
  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own CCS, the song My Sacrifice, or the song Iris -- they belong  
to Clamp, Creed, and the Goo Goo Dolls (who by the way are one of the  
best bands ^~).   
  
  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
  
  
MY SACRIFICE  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
And I'd give up forever to touch you  
'Cause I know that you feel me somehow  
You're the closest thing to heaven that I'll ever be  
And I don't want to go home right now  
  
  
  
~Goo Goo Dolls - Iris  
  
  
  
  
  
  
***Flashback***  
  
  
(3 months earlier)  
  
  
  
"Yes Eriol. I want to be with you. Make me bad, Eriol."  
  
He froze slightly, hearing those words from the violet haired goddess in his arms. Goddess,  
angel, same difference...either one meant divine being of purity.  
  
  
So different from himself.  
  
He had commited many sins in his life, being so evil he hardly had many principles. But  
even he knew to draw the line somewhere. To make her, the most carefully made work  
of God if he'd ever seen one, like him...it WOULD be the worst sin in history, a crime  
against nature itself.  
  
Still, when it came to her...  
  
He had never been afraid of anything in his whole life. Until he'd met her. Then he had  
known fear.  
Because of the things he knew she could do to him, with simply a few words, or a gentle  
smile...  
  
He smirked rather ruefully. Ironically, it had been her who'd been terrified of him, thinking  
he'd cast a spell on her. She had no idea what she'd put him through, the moment he'd  
seen her smile, heard her gentle voice, caught a glimpse of the seraphic being within..  
what he'd gone through as he tried to hold himself back, tried to steel himself against  
imposing his own evilness on her, tried to convince himself that nothing in the universe  
was more opposite than him and her...until the day she had smiled at him. The day his  
reserves had been shot down at once, and he'd known he just had to have her.  
  
No matter what it took.  
  
A slow smile crept across his face as the angel in his arms stepped back and looked at  
him with glowing amethyst eyes, coated in innocent beauty. Beauty which was now  
thread with a trill of fear.   
  
Well, he'd already commited too many sins to be considered a good guy anymore,   
anyway.  
  
She continued to look up at him, her eyes just a shade darker with a hidden fire of  
desire, mixed with terror. Yes, he could feel the terror in the core of his heart, see it  
in her expression..and it didn't worry him at all. Especially with the other thing he could  
feel from her.  
  
She wanted to be with him.  
  
He brushed a smooth, soft tendril of violet behind her ear gently, noting the way she  
trembled under his touch. He smirked again. "You think you're making a mistake, don't  
you?"  
She bit down on her lip. "I know I'm making a mistake," she whispered. "But I just don't  
care." She cast a look back up at him. "It's too late to run and scream now." She  
quoted his earlier words, and slightly to his surprise, there wasn't an ounce of regret in  
her voice.  
  
He crushed her body to his, feeling her bury her head in his shoulder. "This is wrong."  
"So very wrong," her muffled voice agreed.  
"I don't care though."  
"And neither do I."  
  
Indeed, she looked almost happy as she pulled back slightly and stared into his own  
midnight azure eyes. He wasn't the only one who knew things, she knew things about  
him, too. Such as, he loved her just as much as she loved him back now.  
Maybe even more.  
  
He felt another aura, coming close, and he knew who it was even before she did. Of   
course, the girl in his arms would know this voice anywhere. He noticed a look of brief  
pain flash across her eyes...but he didn't want to think about it. He didn't want to think  
about her being happy with anyone else but him, from now on.  
Slipping a hand over her mouth and pulling her with him back into the shadows, he threw  
a magical cloak of invisibility over them both, moments before the other cinnamon haired  
girl dashed into view, her viridian eyes searching the area frantically.  
  
"Tomoyo-chan! Tomoyo-chan, where are you?"  
A chestnut-haired boy crashed through the trees behind her, also scanning his   
surroundings, but with much more alertness and with a more trained eye. Which soon  
turned back to the smaller girl with a mixture of concealed sympathy and worry.  
  
"Sakura," he said quietly. "She must have already gone home."  
The cherry blossom named girl whirled around to face him, her normally clear sea emerald  
eyes now glittering with tears. "That's not possible, Syaoran-kun," she protested in a  
shaky voice. "You know her, do you really think that Tomoyo would just walk away from  
a scene like the one we just had?" Her face turned a shade redder, which made her mirror  
Syaoran's expression as he scowled and glanced away. But he said nothing; he had to  
admit, the prospect of Daidouji Tomoyo simply turning off her camcorder and walking  
away when Sakura had passed out and landed in his arms...he was half expecting  
Armageddeon any day now. He still remembered the astounded shock he'd felt when   
the expected shrill squeals of "Kawaii!" had been absent.  
  
And now it had thrown his partner in cardcapturing into a panic. The cocoa amber eyed  
boy quickly grabbed her wrist as she made to dash off into another section of the forest,  
being careful not to hurt her as he pulled her back. "Sakura, we've searched the entire  
forest already," he said softly, a pained look flickering in his eyes as she burst into tears.  
  
"S-something happened to her," she sobbed. "I know it. _They_ took her, the ones  
who've been doing everything they can to hurt me...and they've succeeded in the best  
way now, they took away my best friend." She collapsed to her knees...  
  
In the blacker than night shadows, amethyst eyes met tainted cerulean, and he could  
read the pain in her at what her sister in spirit was going through, and the confusion in  
her at why she just didn't seem to care that much, why she didn't hate the one holding  
her tightly now with a passion...why she just wanted to stay in his arms forever and a  
day. He just smirked at her in response. You can't hate me, his eyes seemed to say,  
and she looked down in defeat.  
  
Syaoran had managed to bring Sakura back to her feet, holding onto her supportingly.  
"Shh," he said comfortingly. "Don't cry, Sakura. Daidouji-san probably just got an  
emergency call on her cell phone and had to go in a hurry."  
  
Sakura's tears ceased at this, and she looked up. "You think so?" she asked hopefully.  
"That's probably right! One of her bodyguards might have gotten into an accident or  
something..maybe even her mom." She gasped suddenly, and then sprinted back the  
way she had come. "I have to call her, make sure she's alright!"  
  
Syaoran looked up at the sky with a sigh, then followed her...though he did cast a glance  
in the direction of the two hidden dark haired ones before he disappeared from sight.   
But there was no way he could have seen them...  
  
The dark sorcerer waited until he felt the two auras disappear from the park, and then  
released the girl in his arms, stepping out of the shadows.  
  
They were silent for a while, just staring at each other.  
"Well?" he finally spoke out, ever so softly. It was a demand, but it was not, said with  
gentle caring, and no pressure whatsoever. And a clouded, slightly dazed look passed  
over her eyes, as the pain of what she had just witnessed evaporated into invisible  
mist.  
  
"You're bad," she said in a hushed voice, stepping closer to him in a tentative, yet  
somehow teasingly way.   
"I know," he replied in the same hushed voice.  
"You're hurting my best friend," she said.  
Another wicked smile crossed his face. "And you know you should have run away."  
  
She finally reached him, resting her palms against his chest, feeling his heart beating  
under his midnight robes, and she felt happiness. He had a heart, no matter how BAD  
he was.  
  
"I don't want to run away," she whispered, meeting his ever powerful gaze. There was  
a pause as they remained trapped in that moment. Then -- and now he felt undescribable  
love and desire, and also a touch of hesitation? -- as a smile he'd only ever seen on his  
own face crossed hers. A wicked smile. A devilish angel.  
  
He'd never known of anything more beautiful and adorable.  
  
"So, are you going to make me bad, or will I have to satisfy myself with just stalking  
you?"  
  
He captured her mouth in a kiss, unable to hold it back anymore. She closed her eyes,  
letting emotion and trust take over...presenting herself completely to him. Pressing her  
back against a tree...and in the kiss, his aura, his evil aura of darkness, enveloped her  
own pure angelic one, seemingly wiping it out. It coated her, embraced her so tightly,  
got inside her, and she whimpered in pain, fear, and then joyful welcome as it seeped  
through her body, her blood, and penetrated her soul.  
  
Daidouji Tomoyo wrapped her arms around Hiiragizawa Eriol in a tight hug as she was   
tainted by the embrace of the devil.   
  
  
  
***Flashback Ends***  
  
  
  
  
~Eriol's POV~  
  
  
  
  
It had been three months ago today that I had finally felt whole, complete...like I had  
more of a purpose in life than to simply cause suffering to others, especially a certain  
Kinomoto Sakura. Like there was a reason to my life, something that was actually  
a good thing about me.  
  
And the reason, my entire reason for being alive and waking up each morning, was  
right here in my lap, her pretty head resting against my chest as she dozed softly, her  
hair spread around her like a royal purple cloak.  
  
I leaned back against the couch with a soft smile, gazing down at the fairy-tale like   
beauty in my arms, sweeping away some of the hair from her porcelain skin. "Tomoyo..."  
She was a goddess, the angels had definetly brought up something very rare and special  
when they'd made her. Heaven must have been really slipping up if they'd let an angel  
like this escape. Maybe that's why I felt that I'd had something far better than anything  
heaven could ever give me, when she told me she wanted to be with me. When she'd  
told me she loved me.  
  
My smile turned into a slow smirk. Sure, she was an angel to me, to everyone. But she   
Was a dangerous one. Unpredictable, worse than the power of the Firey card. I suppose I  
might have accidentally overdone it when I'd "made her bad". She hadn't exactly been  
the epitome of complete innocence before, and I had been more than a little swept  
away that night...   
  
And this was where the elation turned to pain. No matter how much I felt like I'd been  
given the hidden treasure of the universe in her, no matter how much I loved her (and  
that was a LOT, she meant more to me than anything else had ever, or would ever, in  
my incredibly long life), and no matter how much I nearly put my life down on the line  
just to see her smile every minute (and she would laughingly berate me about spoiling  
her)....I knew I had commited an atrocious deed. I had turned an angel sent to earth..  
into me. She was happy, anyone could see that...yet at the same time, she was also  
decieving, wicked, and could be plain evil at times. Because I had tainted her.  
  
As I continued to stare down at her, her breathing became a little less even..and then  
she cracked open one eye in a look of amusement, annoyance...and my favourite look  
of hers, ever present love. Of course, if I were to name all the expressions of hers which  
I loved, I'd be sitting here until the sun burned out. She could rival Aphrodite in the   
looks department when she was angry.  
  
"You know, it's kind of hard to sleep when your eyes are on me," she complained lightly.  
I smiled at her, my thoughts pushed to the very back of my mind as they always were  
whenever she was near me. Even the more troublesome ones...somewhat. I teasingly  
tangled my hands gently through her glossy tresses, firmly pushing everything in my  
head back. She was happy, I saw that. So what if nature had never meant for us to  
be together? Fate just screwed everyone over in the end.  
  
I swear, I will do anything and everything to make you happy..Tomoyo...  
  
Tomoyo blinked, and I realized I must have whispered the words out loud. "Well, that  
kinda just came out of nowhere," she remarked, tilting her head to the side. "Can I  
know what brought it on?"  
  
I smirked at her, lightly touching her nose. "How about if I keep it a secret from you?"  
I asked. She frowned, crossing her arms in mock anger. "Then I'll say you're the most  
horrible person on Earth," she retorted, but then smiled...and I knew that any mistakes  
I'd made in the past must have been forgiven by a thousandfold, for her to be here with  
me right now.  
  
"But you don't have to worry about me not being happy, Eriol," she said, leaning   
backwards again, her head resting on my stomach from our sprawled positions on the  
living room couch of my place. "You're here. Enough said. I love you."  
  
I touched her tenderly at the sweet, incredibly sincere words. Truly, even with my  
wicked ways, I must have done something almost saintly for me to have her.  
I hugged her tightly, and she hugged me back briefly, before pretending to choke. "Too  
tight, Eriol," she said teasingly in a strangled voice.  
  
I chuckled at her antics. "Really?" I asked innocently, squeezing her tighter. "How's this?"  
She laughed. "Eriol, don't make me have to curse you," she threatened. She really could  
do so, too. I had given her some of my magic when I'd made her like me; her powers  
could now almost rival Sakura's and my descendant's put together.  
  
I pushed her back into the couch pillows. "Do your worst," I said almost invitingly.  
"You don't know how much I'd love to," she countered with a smirk, her eyes bright  
and dancing with temptation and laughter.  
  
A squeal of pure fury, followed by a contradicting delighted giggle, a crash, and a   
strangled cry for help came from the kitchen. I met Tomoyo's eyes, which were   
twinkling with laughter as she glanced toward the kitchen, as a small bluish-black   
catlike creature came shooting out into the living room. We didn't need a rocket   
scientist around to figure out what could be the only thing which had struck such   
terror into the heart of my creation, Spinel Sun.  
  
"Suppi-CHAN!"  
Right on cue. Tomoyo and I braced ourselves as Akizuki Nakuru flew into the living room  
in pursuit of favourite playmate number one. Only this time, she didn't look as if she  
wanted to play, exactly. Personally, if I were Spinel, I would have been running too.  
  
Spinel violently shuddered and dove into Tomoyo's hair which disguised him easily, as  
Nakuru paused momentarily at the sight of us. "Eriol-sama, Tomoyo-chan!" she  
exclaimed, sounding slightly apologetic, before a happy grin swept her face. "How  
KAWAII!!" she squealed.  
  
Tomoyo laughed weakly as I gave my moon guardian an annoyed look, plucking Spinel  
out of Tomoyo's hair. "Okay. What happened this time, and I'm giving you exactly ten  
seconds to explain before--"  
  
Immediately, Nakuru wailed, "Suppi-chan insulted my new outfit! He said I looked like --  
like --"  
"A hooker?" Spinel supplied, none too wisely. Tomoyo visibly winced, as Nakuru cried  
out in fury again and lunged at Spinel. I barely managed to hold her back. "Eriol-sama,  
do something!" she cried. "That's the meanest thing anyone's ever said to me!"  
  
I blinked at her. "Do you even know what it means?" I asked in slight surprise. Nakuru  
slowed down. "No...but I know it's something bad! Touya-kun told me it's something  
bad!"  
  
Tomoyo turned to the creature who was hovering over her, eyeing his adversary warily.  
"Do you know what it means, Spinel-san?" she asked. Spinel looked at her. "Well, I  
heard Keroberus say it once about this girl who was walking down the street once, in an  
outfit similar to the one Ruby Moon has on."  
  
I sighed in frustration; of all the times for Spinel to actually pay attention to Keroberus.  
Even though Keroberus still didn't know the real identity of Spinel, the catlike creature  
still didn't like him much.  
  
"Spinel, girls don't really like being called 'hookers'," Tomoyo explained gently to him.  
"She's no girl," he muttered. Nakuru's hands twitched, and I began hoping that Spinel  
would sleep with one eye open tonight.  
  
I glared at both of them. "I want you two to go into the kitchen, and I don't want you  
to come out until you've settled this matter," I ordered. Spinel protested, and Nakuru  
seemed as if she were about to do so too, but then a wicked, child-happy gleam came  
into her chocolate coloured eyes.  
  
"Sure," she said, in a too-innocent voice that instantly made me suspicious. She reached  
out and seized Spinel, but didn't do anything else to him except keep him in her viselike  
grip. "We can settle this just like normal, civilized beings, can't we Suppi-chan?" Spinel's  
eyes went wide with fear, but Nakuru ignored it, flouncing back to the kitchen.  
  
Things became a bit too quiet for a moment, and Tomoyo's eyes met mine apprehensively.  
Then, on cue again, multiple crashes began resounding from the kitchen. We dashed  
into the other room, barely ducking in time to avoid being hit by a shooting Spinel as he  
crashed into the overhead clock, bounced off and headed in a beeline for the hanging  
pots and pans. We only had to take one look at the cackling Nakuru with the jar of  
pure sugar she had in her hands.  
  
"Nakuru!" I snapped, dodging to the side as Spinel flew past me again.  
She immediately looked apologetic. "What?" she asked. "You said to settle the matter,  
so I did. This way, we won't be fighting anymore tonight, and with the amount of sugar  
I gave him, he'll wake up with such a bad hangover tomorrow that he won't even   
remember a thing! And on top of that, I get my revenge!" She laughed in complete  
satisfaction, snatching Spinel out of the air as he was about to whiz by her and into  
the ceramic dishes on the counter.  
  
He was silenced, falling asleep almost immediately, and I winced, realizing she must have  
given him a lot for him to act so ecstatic one minute and be out like a light the next.  
Quiet finally descended; that was a plus.  
  
Tomoyo suddenly laughed at the antics of the two guardians. "You two are just so.."  
she shook her head, trailing off. And I had to admit, I could never stay angry with  
Nakuru for long.  
  
Nakuru's face burst into a bright smile, and then she squealed happily. "Oh, you two are  
just soooo kawaii!" she cried, squeezing me in a stranglehold before turning it to Tomoyo.  
"Tomoyo-chan! I'm so glad you came to stay with us, it's just like having a sister! And  
you make Eriol-sama so happy..." she trailed off, her eyes bright as she practically  
floated dreamily to her room. "Now if I could get me and Touya-kun like that.."  
  
"Good luck," I muttered as the door to her room closed. Tomoyo laughed softly again.  
"You're so lucky to have them."  
I smiled at her, hugging her to me, feeling her now-dark aura of cream and lavender  
tickle against mine. "I'm more lucky to have you," I murmured as we went back to the   
living room and sat on the couch.   
  
The television program we had been watching before Tomoyo had fallen asleep had   
ended, and the evening news were now on, with a very interesting headline.  
"...and the daughter of millionare company owner Daidouji Sonomi of Daidouji Toys is  
still missing from her home. The thirteen year old girl has not returned home to her  
house for three months and counting, yet sources say that she has still been attending  
her school of Tomoeda Elementary regularly. Daidouji Tomoyo has yet to be--"  
  
Tomoyo frowned and turned off the television. "Those people really annoy me," she  
muttered. I didn't speak, still running the headline through my mind. It wasn't as if it  
were anything new, the news of Tomoyo's supposed "disappearance" had been running  
since that day three months ago. No one really took it seriously anymore, since Tomoyo  
was always at school. She just didn't go home...she stayed with me. And that hardly   
mattered since her mother was barely ever present anyway.  
  
But it still sent a tremor through me, as I watched the people on the television in a  
frantic frenzy, over one special girl. And I had to ask myself the question again: Did I  
do the right thing?  
  
"Eriol."  
I glanced at Tomoyo, and she pulled me into a kiss. Instinctively, I knew she'd read my  
mind; she now had the power to do that too. "I love you."  
It was just another thing that made me so immune and steely to everything else in time  
and space..yet completely vulnerable and exposed to her. I held her close to me, looping  
some of her dark lilac strands of hair through my fingers, never wanting to let go.   
  
I would give up forever just to stay here with her for eternity. She made me feel free  
to myself, to know that the last few centuries had all been worth staying alive for, just  
to meet her.  
  
But eternity waited for no one, and neither did fate. Another question sprang to my   
mind, my biggest terror of all. We were a work against nature, me..and now her. She  
was a tainted angel now, almost more evil than I was...that was more dangerous than  
anything. We were not supposed to have met, to be together.  
  
And now that I had her...could I keep her?  
  
  
  
  
~*~*~  
  
  
  
  
I let go of her hand once we reached the school grounds early the next morning. I  
think that by now, anyone who had half a brain could tell what was going on between  
the two of us, but it was best to not show just how deeply our feelings ran for each  
other. People might start to get suspicious.  
  
Namely a tawny-haired boy with mocha amber eyes.  
  
I felt his presence, along with my young victim's, the moment we stepped onto the  
school's property.  
  
"Wonder why they're here so early?" Tomoyo mused from next to me, cocking her  
head slightly to the left in consideration. Then she smirked. "You don't suppose they  
could suspect little ol' innocent us, could they?"  
  
I smirked back at her. "I don't know about me, but perish the thought when it comes  
to you."  
Tomoyo was about to make a remark when Sakura suddenly burst out of the school  
doors, her face alight with everyday excitement. "Tomoyo-chan! Eriol-kun!" she  
greeted, waving. "Good morning."  
  
I watched the look that crossed Tomoyo's face, struggling to keep my own expression  
neutral. A faint look of contempt flickered in her eyes, then vanished, too quick for  
Sakura's innocently untrained eye to see. But I could still feel the scorn oozing below  
the surface...a strange type of hatred for the girl who had once been her best friend  
in the world. A hatred I had put there, unconsciously, but strong. I suppose I must  
have been feeling slightly jealous of her relationship with the Card Mistress that night.  
The feeling had entered into her during the...transmission, therefore causing Tomoyo  
to feel a deep disliking for the emerald eyed girl. She was even more evil than me.  
  
She was the one that was BAD now. It was not exactly a thought to relish, though I  
wouldn't have it any other way. The guilt continued to eat at me.  
  
"Oh hello, Sakura-chan," Tomoyo trilled without missing a beat. She gave her a smile.  
"Strange to see you up so early. Was there a full moon last night?"  
"Ha, ha," Sakura intoned sarcastically, with a giggle. "Actually, Chiharu-chan called  
me last night and told me that she couldn't make it to school today, so she won't  
be at cheerleading practice either. And today was supposed to be the day we made  
up a new cheer for the squad, so since I'm the co-captain, I have to do it."  
  
"Oh that's nice," Tomoyo said.  
"Syaoran-kun's helping me," Sakura added, gesturing to the school as the indicated  
boy just now walked out. He came within five feet of us before realizing I was there,  
and immediately reassumed his normal scowling position. I had to concentrate all   
the magic I had just to keep from bursting into laughter. Had to admit, the boy had  
a good judge of character. I wasn't exactly the most trustworthy person.  
  
Then things reached a more serious tone. "Uh, Tomoyo-chan?" Sakura began,   
hesitantly. As if afraid of Tomoyo's reaction, which said something right there. Sakura  
would never be afraid of anyone she trusted.  
"Yes Sakura-chan?" Tomoyo replied innocently. At this, Syaoran's heated gaze to  
me shifted to Tomoyo in a worried frown. Which was strange, to say the least.  
  
"Your mother called me again," Sakura explained. "She thought you were staying at  
my house again. I know you don't want anyone to know where you've been lately,"  
she added hurriedly, seeing something flash across Tomoyo's violet orbs. "Don't worry,  
I told her you were spending the night, but you couldn't come to the phone since you  
were taking a nap. But Tomoyo-chan...where exactly have you been keeping yourself?  
I know you aren't staying with any of the others. And why'd you run away from home  
in the first place?" The questions just poured out.  
  
Tomoyo immediately adopted a guarded look. "It's nothing, Sakura-chan," she said,  
and though her voice sounded normal to the others, I inwardly shuddered at the ice  
behind it.   
  
"Mother is going on a business trip this morning anyway," she continued. "And she  
won't be back until sometime next week, so you won't have to worry about being  
bothered anymore."  
  
"But Tomoyo-chan," Sakura immediately protested. "What's going on with you? How  
come you won't tell me anything anymore?" I heard the wounded tone in her voice.  
Syaoran heard it too, though why he found that as a legitimate reason to give me a  
look that promised instant death was beyond me.  
  
Tomoyo, on the other hand, actually giggled, which was enough to make even Sakura  
suspicious. "Sakura-chan..." Although her voice was in laughing reassurance, I could  
read her inner contempt. "Don't worry," she said finally. "I'm just fine. Really."  
Sakura hesitated. "You sure?" she asked.  
  
Tomoyo looked her straight in the eye. "Yes."  
Sakura's face brightened considerably; she would never suspect Tomoyo of actually  
being able to look her in the eye and lie to her. Actually, I had never thought Tomoyo  
would have done that, either.   
  
But she had.  
  
"Come on, Tomoyo-chan," said Sakura, pulling Tomoyo along with her back towards  
the school. "You can help me make up the new cheer."  
  
The doors closed softly behind them, the faint noise resounding in the still, early   
morning air. I looked down at the ground thoughtfully, thinking about a spell to cast  
on Sakura that night.  
  
"Hiiragizawa."  
  
I had never heard his voice sound so cold, even to me. I knew he didn't trust me  
much, with good reason. Perhaps he even hated me. But this seemed to run so much  
deeper than hatred.  
  
Nonetheless, I gazed back at him coolly. "Yes, Li?"  
He took a step up to me - and then socked me. Not that it hurt much, it only caused  
me to stumble back a few paces. But I was surprised at the sheer anger behind the  
action. Syaoran was irrational at times, but one thing I'd learned from him was that  
he didn't fight when it wasn't necessary. He didn't go around picking fights.  
Then what was up with that?  
  
"What was that for?" I demanded, allowing a note of annoyance to enter my voice.  
Syaoran glared at me, and it was a really good thing that looks couldn't kill, or I  
would be a steaming puddle on the ground, regardless of all my power.  
"Two things," he said icily. "What did you do to Daidouji, and whatever it was, you  
better undo it, and fast."  
  
I blinked; so he knew. Amazingly perceptive he was.   
"I underestimated you, dearest descendant," I said smoothly; since he already knew  
everything, he could obviously put two and two together and figure out that I was  
related to him.  
  
He gave me another scathing glare. "I could destroy you right here, right now," he  
hissed. "You have no idea how much I want to. But I consider other people's feelings.  
I know Daidouji-san would never forgive me if I did."  
  
I don't know why, but using a quick charm, I shoved him back against the brick wall  
of the school. Maybe it was because he had brought Tomoyo into this...I didn't really  
feel like going into a situation with her right now.  
Especially since it was a situation I had no idea how to deal with.  
  
But it wasn't like I was getting a choice.  
"Do you really think you could do such a thing, Li?" I asked calmly, watching him  
struggle.  
Syaoran continued to fight the charm, pushing himself away from the wall. "Bastard."  
I raised my eyebrow in faint surprise; I had never known my cute descendant to  
swear either, or at least, not in front of anybody. "Really Li, do I need to remind you  
about keeping your tongue in check?"  
  
Syaoran looked as if nothing would please him more to strangle me. "I want to know  
why you've done what you did to Daidouji, and why you're doing this to Sakura," he  
demanded coldly.   
  
I shrugged nonchantly. "We fell in love with each other," I remarked casually. "She  
feels the same way I do about her. She's really the one who asked me to make her  
like myself, so that we could be together."  
Syaoran snorted. "You expect me to believe that?"  
I frowned. "Truthfully, descendant, I couldn't care less what you believe. Oh, and  
about Sakura...well now, it wouldn't be a surprise anymore if I told you, would it?"  
  
Syaoran's eyes narrowed dangerously; putting his love's best friend in danger was  
one thing, but implying threats on Sakura herself...I was walking a very, very thin  
line. "Why did you change her?" he repeated, in barely suppressed fury. "You may  
be demonic, manipulative, take your pick, but even I know you're not stupid. You and  
Daidouji-san are nothing like each other. It's like putting a dove with a bat." He   
paused, and an unexpected smirk crossed his face. "You do realize which one will  
cancel the other out, right?"  
  
I could feel myself going on guard; he was starting to hit too close to home with his  
comments. "I love her, Li," I replied simply.  
He gave another snort, this time in contempt. Contempt...over me? In the situation  
he was in, too? He knew as well as I did that I could blast him into oblivion right here  
and now if the desire overpowered me. I had to hand it to him; my descendant had  
guts.  
  
"Love?" he echoed, mockingly. "Is that what you call it?"  
Something inside me just snapped, and this time, I didn't even bother with charms  
and magical spells. I just slammed him back against the wall by force, a type of fury  
I had never felt before welling up inside of me. He had touched upon my most   
vulnerable spot, questioning my love for Tomoyo. Forget guts; Syaoran just had a   
huge death wish, that's all.  
  
"Don't you ever doubt me about that again," I told him, my voice oddly calm and low,  
with a freezing edge which echoed all the years of my long life in it. "Tomoyo means  
more to me than the entire world on a silver platter." I paused also, as he continued  
to glare defiantly at me. "But then, who are you to talk? What exactly would you know  
about love anyway, if you can't even tell a girl how you feel?" I couldn't resist the  
cruel counter; he deserved it.  
  
But he wasn't too pleased with it. He shoved me away from him hard, and looked like  
he was about to commit murder right there in the schoolyard.  
"I take it back about you not being stupid, Hiiragizawa," he said in a colder voice than  
the one I had just used. "You're so dumb. But then, I guess if you keep telling   
yourself something, you start to believe it eventually." My blood began to boil again,  
and he pressed on.  
  
"I haven't told Sakura the way I feel about her because she's in love with Yukito-san.  
And before you make some stupid comment about how I'm a coward, that isn't the  
only reason I don't say anything. Sure I'm afraid; I'm not going to be like you and lie.  
But I know that if I tell her anything, she'll be upset, and she'll start tearing herself  
up because she's confused, and wouldn't want to hurt my feelings." His voice had   
taken on a softer quality, but I'm sure I was the only one who noticed. "Sakura can't  
stand to hurt anyone's feelings, and she practically kills herself inside whenever she  
does end up doing so. I don't want her to feel like that. I just want her to be happy,  
and I don't care if she never knows how I feel, just as long as she's happy."  
  
I was momentarily stunned into silence, stunned at having witnessed such a heartfelt  
confession from the ever-cool Li.  
  
He glared at me again. "That's what REAL love is, Hiiragizawa," he bit out sharply.  
"When you care so much about the person that you just want them to be happy, no  
matter what the cost."  
Involuntarily, I actually took a step backwards. "I...I really do love Tomoyo," I   
countered, not sure how much of an effect it had.  
  
Apparently, not much. He gave me another look of scorn. "Sure, we all believe that,  
Hiiragizawa."  
Now I was angry. "Tomoyo IS happy with me," I told him angrily. "She tells me so all  
the time."  
Syaoran rolled his eyes. "Like hell, she is," he replied simply. "Well, I've known   
Daidouji-san longer than you have, and one thing I know for a fact that makes her  
happy is Sakura, whenever they're together." He paused, letting the words sink in.   
"Do you really think she could be happy hating her best friend?"  
  
I winced inwardly, yet struggled to control myself. I'd die before I let him know how  
much he was actually getting to me.   
"Daidouji-san used to take pleasure in the simple things of life, too," Syaoran continued,  
now faintly accusing. "Videotaping us everywhere, and making costumes for Sakura.  
Tell me Hiiragizawa, has she done any of those things lately? I don't remember   
Sakura wearing a costume of Tomoyo's in such a long time."  
  
I faintly bit down on my lip; he was right. I hadn't seen Tomoyo pull out her camcorder  
ever since..I had tainted her. And sure, she occasionally made outfits for Ruby Moon  
whenever she would request them, but the clothes were always of a dark quality,  
contrasting drastically with the colourful frilly garments she had once used to make.  
  
Right then, I started realizing some other things that had completely changed in her.  
Her sweet spirit. The way she would cut off her right hand for any of her friends if  
they would only ask for it. Her smile...yes, her smile, the best thing about her, now  
had a wicked edge to it, and although I loved that edge...it was the smile of a devil  
now, not of an angel.  
  
It was my smile.  
  
Syaoran was watching the expressions flicker across my face, and then he finally  
spoke up, in a more quiet voice, but every bit as icy. "So you finally see it," he said.  
"You ruined her. She was an angel...and you destroyed that. Really Hiiragizawa, I  
would have thought you were smarter than that. You had to have realized that you  
can never mix a girl like her with something like you." Contempt filtered into his tone  
again. "I hope for your sake, not just hers, that you realize what you're doing. 'Cause  
I don't know what exactly goes on in that twisted mind of yours, but if you really do  
care about her, not that I believe it, but if you do..." he trailed off momentarily. "It's  
going to hurt someday, Hiiragizawa. Believe me, it'll hurt more than anything. And  
by the way," he continued, turning away. "Consider this a fair warning. Do anything  
else to hurt her or Sakura, and I promise you now, nothing will ever save you."  
  
  
  
  
~*~*~  
  
  
  
  
I knew I was cutting class, but I just didn't care about small details like that. There  
had been no way that I would have been able to stick around after what had happened  
in the schoolyard early that morning.  
  
I leaned back with a sigh into my throne-like red chair, where, according to Tomoyo,  
Nakuru and Spinel, was the 'Shrine of Evil' - the only place I would contemplate evil   
thoughts. At the moment, I wasn't thinking anything evil however...unless you counted   
how I was inwardly hating myself with a passion for being the way I was.  
  
This was the last thing that I wanted to accept, but it was true - Syaoran had been  
right. Tomoyo had been Heaven's greatest gift to the earth...but of course, the one  
to claim her had been about as unholy as you could get. I liked to think that I wasn't  
a bad person, I never exactly HURT people if I could help it. But who was I kidding; I  
was evil, I was bad.  
  
And I had made her like me.  
  
I groaned softly, dropping my head into my hands, my heart physically twisting around  
in my chest, which scared me since it had never done anything like this before. What  
had I done? Yes, I loved Tomoyo, I hadn't lied to Syaoran at all...I couldn't even bear  
to think or imagine of life without her, and I would constantly ask myself each night  
how I had ever survived before. The concept just seemed impossible. I was positive  
this had to be the worse case of love in creation.  
  
But according to Syaoran, if you really loved someone, you would want them to be  
happy.  
Tomoyo had constantly told me that nothing made her happier than being with me,  
and that she didn't care what I had done to her. But although I had no idea why I  
was only realizing this now, she had never actually said that she enjoyed living like  
this better than her old life. I suppose I must have accepted the answer in her actions;  
the way she was always so eager to help me cast a spell on Syaoran and Sakura, the  
obvious love she displayed for Ruby Moon and Spinel.  
  
That had been really stupid of me, though. Because no matter what the circumstances,  
an angel could never be happy living the life of a demon.  
And I had destroyed the angel in her.  
If she ever did return to normal, if somehow, my spell happened to wear off...would  
she hate me for what I had done to her?  
  
"Eriol-sama!"  
I froze, then cringed as I heard Spinel's accusing outburst as he flew in front of my  
face, his catlike features etched into surprise, a dishtowel hanging from his paws.   
"What on earth are you doing here at this time of day? Don't tell me you're actually   
skipping school!"  
  
Despite myself, I had to chuckle at the way he was making it sound like I was   
committing an unforgivable sin, even for me. Well, I suppose I must have already   
done enough of those.   
  
"Spinel, relax," I told him with a little smirk.   
"But Eriol-sama, really!"  
"Don't worry, Mother dearest, I'll catch up with whatever I missed tomorrow. Or else  
Tomoyo can tell me about it..."  
  
Spinel's expression changed; he wasn't blind to the way my sentence had just trailed  
away like that. I hadn't even told Tomoyo that I would be leaving the school, she had  
still been inside with Sakura when I'd left.  
  
Spinel sighed. "Sorry, Eriol-sama, it's just somewhat of a surprise."  
"Yeah, those happen sometimes," I replied.  
Spinel studied me carefully. "What happened?" he suddenly inquired. "It takes a lot  
to shake you up, yet you are definetly shaken."  
  
I contemplated lying to him...but lying was supposed to be another sin, and so help  
me, I was so sick of those. Besides, this wasn't something that I relished to keep   
hidden, except from the subject of these thoughts, of course.  
  
"Spinel?" I asked, hesitant. "Do you...what do you think of Tomoyo being brought   
over to our side?"  
Spinel was quiet for a while. "Well," he finally began. "In strategy, it WAS a stroke  
of genius to turn Sakura-san's best friend against her secretly."  
I got a little ticked off at that. "I didn't change Tomoyo to use her, Spinel," I snapped  
angrily.  
  
Despite my obvious temperament, Spinel remained placid. "Of course you didn't,"  
he responded matter-of-factly. "It's clear that you weren't even thinking at all when  
you did it."  
I froze. "What's...that supposed to mean?"  
  
Spinel shrugged, twisting the dishrag around his paws. "Love does that to you, Eriol-  
sama," he explained patiently, as if I was a child. "Though you may not know it, since  
you have never experienced the emotion, of course." There was a strange tone in his  
voice which I couldn't place. I frowned, swatting him away.  
  
"Interesting words, coming from a talking plushie," I muttered.  
Spinel actually snickered. "Sticks and stones, dearest master," he reminded me,  
drifting back to the kitchen sink filled with dirty dishes. I followed him, leaned against  
the wall as I watched him work.  
  
"I really do not see what you are so upset about," Spinel remarked after a while. "It  
is obvious that you changed Tomoyo-san because you loved her."  
I looked at the floor. "Did I?" I murmured, almost to myself. I distantly heard the  
running water in the sink turn off, Spinel's reaction to my quiet statement.  
  
"What kind of question is that?" he demanded. "Anyone can see what the two of you  
have between each other-"  
"Spinel, I made her evil!" I suddenly burst out, clenching my fists unknowingly. "She  
was an angel, she was the sweetest girl in Tomoeda - and I destroyed that part of  
her spirit!"  
  
Spinel floated in the air for a moment in sheer shock over my outburst, silent. Then,  
"Of course you did, Eriol-sama. You had to erase her aura to replace it with yours,  
weren't you aware of that?"  
I slid to the floor, burying my face in my arms as the guilt continued to eat away at  
me like a corrosive acid.  
  
Spinel flew over. "Eriol-sama, she asked you to do it."  
"I pressed her to ask me," I corrected in a muffled voice. "I just want her to be happy,  
but I also want her to be with me..." And I couldn't have it both ways, was my   
unfinished sentence. I knew that now, had known it all along, though I had chosen to  
keep myself blind from the truth, blinded by my feelings, and my feelings only. Meaning  
I hadn't considered hers at all.  
  
"And now she isn't happy," I whispered. She couldn't be happy when she was with me,  
no matter how much she made me feel that heaven and earth had merged when we  
were together.   
  
Spinel frowned; I could feel him frown, even if I wasn't looking up at him. "Now, that  
is just nonsense, Eriol-sama, and even you have to know that. Don't even think of  
telling me you haven't noticed the way she looks at you."  
  
A small tingle of happy pleasure went through me at Spinel's words, but it was  
quickly snuffed out. "She's evil, Spinel. She was never meant to be evil...but she is  
now, because of me."  
  
Spinel was about to reply, but then we both heard the resounding SLAM! of the front  
door, and Nakuru's shrill "WEEEE'RRRREEEE HOOOOMMMMEEE!! Guess who else  
decided to have a half-school day, too?"  
  
I got to my feet in a subdued manner as an annoyed glare swept Spinel's face, just  
as the two girls dashed into the kitchen. "For Christsake, is today the international  
skip-school day or something?" he demanded in more than a little agitation.  
  
Nakuru blinked at him. "Actually Spinel, yes it is," she pointed out. "It IS Friday, you  
know, that kind of qualifies."  
Spinel threw up his tiny paws in exasperation, wisely deciding not to contradict Nakuru's  
less-than-balanced mind.  
"I think somebody likes their privacy just a little too much," Tomoyo said teasingly,  
before catching sight of me. Her dark lavender eyes widened, and she was in front of  
me the next second.  
  
"Hiiragizawa Eriol, what in the world are you doing here?" she demanded in indignation.  
"You never told me you were going home, I was so worried something had happened  
to you-" she broke off, taking a deep shuddering breath, and looking into her violet  
orbs, I saw the deep anxiety in them. She had really cared about me...I put a hand on  
her shoulder, but couldn't bring myself to do anything much else.  
  
'She deserves so much better.'  
I didn't know where that thought had come from, but could I really argue with it?  
  
Tomoyo blinked back tears in impatient annoyance, which was enough to tear anyone's  
heart apart. No one could bear to see an angel cry, I was no exception. It was a literal   
crime against God itself.  
  
I had commit a few of those as well.   
  
"I seriously thought Li had done something to you," she continued, laughing lightly.  
"I mean, I know you were talking to him early this morning, and he came into class  
not looking too happy..."  
  
I suddenly stiffened. "You...you didn't do anything to him, did you?" I asked quietly,  
praying for a negative answer, some kind of sign that the angel of purity was still  
somewhere in there, that I hadn't created a monster out of a godlike being. I needed  
to know, so badly, if the real her had somehow survived my takeover on her soul.  
  
Tomoyo hesitated. "Well, I said some awful things," she murmured, tracing a pattern  
absently on my shirt. "But nothing they didn't deserve. And I didn't even use any  
power on them; you can be proud of me for that, Eriol." She smiled.  
  
I didn't know what to make of her answer, except realizing distantly that it would  
certainly have shown just what a job I had done on her. I finally settled for just  
crushing her close to me, desperately wishing for what had to be the millionth time  
that I wouldn't lose the best thing that could ever happen to me.  
  
"E-Eriol?" Tomoyo stammered, taken by surprise. I heard Nakuru's exuberant squeal  
of happiness, and a strangled choke from Spinel a moment later.  
"Tomoyo," I murmured into her silky long tresses, trying the way I always did when-  
ever I held her to believe that I wasn't just dreaming. "I love you so much..."  
  
Tomoyo gave an affectionate sigh which was slightly muffled, and she ran a hand  
through my own locks. "Not this again," she murmured laughingly. "Come on, what  
exactly did Li say to you? 'Cause I know he must have had something to do with this."  
  
I couldn't help but notice how she called him 'Li', and not 'Li-kun'.  
I pulled back slightly, and looked at her. "Tomoyo, are you happy?"  
She sighed, running an ivory, silky smooth finger down the side of my face as she  
gave me THAT smile, the one she apparently 'reserved specially just for me'. Innocence  
with a touch of wickedness, which could cause the best kind of desire.  
  
"Eriol, I'm not happy anymore, because you're unhappy," she told me softly. "Yes, I  
am happy here, I'm happy with you...I can't tell you what you mean to me, 'cause  
I'm not sure I can describe it and have it make sense." She sighed. "But you're sad  
now, so I'm sad too." Wrapping her arms around me, she pulled me into a hug. "I  
can't be happy when you're sad...I love you too much."  
  
"KAWAII!" exclaimed Nakuru, still clutching Spinel tightly, who was now turning a  
paler shade of blue from lack of air.  
I completely ignored my creations though; I was too touched by her words. How could  
any one person throw me into complete turmoil with just a few simple words?   
  
('She deserves so much better...')  
  
I pulled her closer, if that was even possible. "Don't worry Tomoyo," I said, with a  
genuine laugh this time. "I can't be sad now anymore. Because you're here."  
"AHHH! Ultimate kawaii!" squealed Nakuru, as Spinel finally managed to free himself  
from her clutches.  
  
Now I was getting annoyed, and didn't bother to hide it in my look to Nakuru. Her  
chocolate eyes widened in innocence. "What?"  
Spinel massaged his temple, the decibel of Nakuru's voice finally grating on his nerves  
too.   
  
"Uh, Nakuru-san," Tomoyo said quickly. "Why don't I show you the dress I made for  
you a couple nights ago?"  
"You made ANOTHER new dress for me?" Nakuru asked excitedly, joyfully throwing  
her arms around Tomoyo. "Oh my God, Tomoyo-chan, you're the best! I hope you  
stay here forever, and forever, and another forever! You will, won't you?" She looked  
pleadingly, first at Tomoyo, then at me.  
  
Tomoyo shot me a quick glance, then nodded, pulling Nakuru out of the kitchen and  
sending a quick wink at Spinel, who in turn gave her a grateful look. "Sure, whatever  
you want, Nakuru-san." Their voices faded away, yet Nakuru's words stayed fresh  
in my mind.  
  
("I hope you stay here forever, and forever, and another forever! You will,   
won't you?")  
  
I clenched my eyes shut, leaning back against the wall. Nakuru didn't know just how  
much I agreed with her. I wanted Tomoyo to be by my side for...well, the rest of my  
life, however long that would be...  
  
...but the real question was if she would be able to live with herself for that long.  
  
  
  
  
~*~*~  
  
  
  
  
The moment Tomoyo saw me sitting in my red chair, with Ruby Moon and Spinel next  
to me, she immediately bounded over and sat cross-legged on the carpet in front of  
me. "So...what are you planning for them tonight?" she demanded. I felt the familiar  
guilt course through me at the eagerness in her voice, the eagerness to cause   
suffering to the girl whom had once been the best friend she'd ever had. Eagerness I  
had caused...  
  
I hesitated, wondering briefly if I should say 'nothing at all'. Ruby Moon cancelled out  
that option. "Eriol-sama's already started something down at the King Penguin Park,"  
she informed my partner. "And you know what?" she added brightly. "It's almost in  
the exact same place where you and Eriol-sama first admitted your love for each  
other! Isn't that SO romantic? It's the most kawaii thing-"  
  
"If it isn't too hard for you, Ruby Moon, would you please keep your mind on track?"  
Spinel Sun told her sarcastically. "I know it's like asking for the sun, moon, and stars  
in a cardboard package, but-" He was swiftly cut off by a kick to his midsection, and  
Ruby Moon growled under her breath. "I like your false form better," she complained.  
"It's so much easier to punish you when you're small."  
  
Tomoyo ignored them, turning to me, her eyes nearly shining liquid amethyst. "Can  
we go see the action up close?" she asked me. "Pretty please?" The innocent demand  
had a teasing wickedness threaded into it.  
I smiled, glancing up at the ceiling. "Well, we might as well go now," I announced.  
"I do have something extra special in mind tonight, anyway."  
  
I couldn't stop the evil smirk that crossed my face at the words, recalling just WHAT  
I had in mind. It shouldn't be that much of a shock. Syaoran already knew my real  
identity anyway, and it really wasn't fair for dear Sakura to be left all alone in the  
dark. But revealing MY identity to them wasn't the only thing I was planning to do.  
I admitted it, my guilt inflicted from Syaoran's words that morning had quickly turned  
to anger. And I certainly wasn't the sweetest person whenever I did get angry.  
Besides, I was curious to see just how "nothing would save me" if I hurt Sakura.  
  
There were going to be a lot of surprises that night.  
  
  
  
  
~*~*~  
  
  
  
  
"Syaoran-kun, watch out!"   
Syaoran dodged just in time to avoid being impaled by the dagger-sharp vine which  
had just whizzed by him, landing at Sakura's side. "It's okay," he quickly reassured  
her as she rushed to his side. "Can you use the Wood card, to counter these things?"  
Sakura set her face in determination. "Of course I can," she pointed out obviously.  
"Why wouldn't I be able to?"  
  
Syaoran grabbed her arm just as she was pulling out the card. "Sakura, I know you're  
exhausted from cheerleading this afternoon," he began, in a voice laced with worry.  
Sakura wasn't blind to it, and she smiled at him brightly. "Relax Syaoran-kun, when  
have I ever NOT been able to do this?" As he began to protest, she held up a hand.  
"I'm not that tired, Syaoran-kun," she told him. "But thanks for worrying anyway."  
  
You know, red really didn't go with the colour of Syaoran's traditional battle robes,  
I mused as me and the others stayed hidden up a tree cloaked in shadow. But I guess  
Syaoran wasn't aware of that.  
  
"Very resourceful of them," Tomoyo whispered from my side as she stared down at  
Sakura using the Wood card against the woodland army we had put up against her  
that night.  
  
The "army" disintegrated, Sakura only stumbled back a little in faint exhaustion (which  
was still enough to practically throw Syaoran into a panic), but of course, I knew their  
senses weren't diminishing. No, of course they weren't. Because they still had to be  
picking up on me. And I wasn't planning on going anywhere.  
  
Sure enough...  
  
"I'm still feeling IT, Syaoran-kun," Sakura murmured, looking around apprehensively.  
"They're here."  
Syaoran was feeling it too, but of course, the obvious difference was that he knew  
exactly what it was. Now hatred crossed his face.  
  
He glanced hesitantly at Sakura, and I realized that he probably thought it would hurt  
her if she found out my true identity. But people got hurt, it was just another factor of  
life.  
  
"Hiiragizawa," he said in a low voice, still loud enough for Sakura to hear, however.  
"Show yourself."  
  
Tomoyo's shock radiated from next to me. "You never told me he knew about you,"  
she hissed. I just gave her a smirk. "It's a night for surprise, Tomoyo." Then I gave  
a quick gesture to Spinel and Ruby Moon, indicating that they were not to show   
themselves.  
Down on the ground, Sakura was staring at Syaoran, positive that he had lost his   
mind. Indeed, she was actually taking a hesitant step away from him. "Uh, Syaoran-  
kun, are you okay?" she asked him.  
  
Syaoran froze, then glanced at Sakura, a very concerned look on his face. "You're  
gonna have to trust me on this one, Sakura," he said quietly.  
Sakura's eyes were huge. "But HIIRAGIZAWA-KUN?" she demanded in incredulity.  
"Syaoran-kun, I know you don't like him much, but isn't that a little extreme?"  
  
I smiled, emerging myself from the shadows, yet keeping Tomoyo hidden in the  
darkness. "Don't be so hard on my dear descendant, Sakura-san," I said smoothly.  
"By now, I was sure you would have learned to trust his instinct."  
  
Sakura's face went completely ashen - it was as if all the blood in her veins had   
suddenly turned to water, she was so pale. And even I had to feel a twinge of pity  
for her; this was going to be nothing on when she found out about Tomoyo.  
  
Syaoran was glaring at me with the utmost hatred in his taffy-amber eyes, his clan  
sword held very tightly in his hand. I was half waiting for him to snap off the handle  
in his fury. And of course, he had assumed his ever-protective position in front of   
the Card Mistress.  
  
"E-E-Eriol-kun," Sakura whispered in a barely audible voice. "It's been you...this whole  
time it's been you..?"  
I smirked at her. "Surprises, surprises," I murmured airily.  
Tears sprang to her spring-green eyes. "But...why? What did I ever do to you?"  
  
I sighed, rolling my eyes to the sky up above. "A lesson learned in time, my dear."  
It was mostly true, anyway.  
Syaoran was ready to kill, and he clearly wasn't thinking rationally as he raced up  
to me. I barely managed to pull my sun staff out in time to block his sword before he  
attempted to decapitate me.  
  
"I should kill you right here and right now," he hissed in seething fury. "I should just  
make you die. There is no reason you should live." The venom in his voice was slightly  
unnerving; I could see in his eyes that he was about to carry out his threats, all   
because I had managed to cause pain to one certain girl. And they hadn't seen any-  
thing yet.  
  
Ironically, however, it was that same certain girl who managed to restrain him.  
  
"Syaoran-kun, no!" she cried, tugging back on the arm that held the sword. "You can't  
kill him, you can't!"  
Syaoran was left in shock, and truthfully, so was I.   
"Sakura, give one good reason he should live," Syaoran demanded in exasperation.  
He wasn't going to go against a plea from the light of his life, but he was still very  
confused.  
  
Sakura hesitated momentarily, her eyes suddenly shifting to me with the incredible  
innocence of childhood she held. "He's...I don't care what he says, he's still my friend.  
And he's still a person, and every person deserves a second chance."  
  
"He's not a person," Syaoran muttered, still glaring daggers at me. "He's Satan  
incarnate."  
I just gave him a light-hearted smile. "Oh, I suppose I can't argue with you there,"  
I said simply. "But not to worry, I'm not the only one of my kind."  
As I said this, I squeezed the snowy hand of the angelic fiend in the darkness behind   
me. Her signal to make an entrance.  
  
Though I could have sworn there was some slight hesitation in her, she performed the  
task with admirable ease. That was my girl.  
  
Sakura had taken an uneasy step back. "You mean...there are more of..whatever it is  
you are?" she asked slowly.  
Tomoyo stepped out of the shadows, a cold smile on her face. "I'm sorry Sakura-chan,  
were you expecting a negative answer?"  
  
Sakura looked as if she were about to pass out, as her already wide eyes got about  
two sizes bigger. Syaoran was ready to attack me viciously...again.  
"Tomoyo-chan......" Sakura's voice seemed to die in her throat.  
Tomoyo giggled, though something flashed in the violet depths of her eyes. "You were  
expecting maybe Naoko-chan?" she asked in a seemingly innocent tone.   
  
Syaoran stared at her in disbelief for a moment, at the poisonous hatred directed  
straight at himself and her former best friend, then turned to me. Once again, I had  
to thank God for little miracles: that looks couldn't kill. "You're just sick, you know   
that?"  
  
Sakura had been gazing at her friend in numb shock until Syaoran's words snapped  
her out of the trance, and she turned to me, her eyes positively flaming; any thoughts  
of acceptance or forgiveness were long forgotten. "What did you do to her?" she  
demanded angrily.  
  
Tomoyo's eyes met mine, and despite the heat of the moment, I felt the ice in me  
melt away with just that single look of hers. "Why don't you ask her yourself?" I  
recommended softly, the comment aimed for Sakura.  
"Newsflash, you guys," Tomoyo told them with another smile. "Eriol didn't DO anything  
to me; I'm the one who went and fell for him." I actually saw a blush sweep her   
cheeks, for the first time in a long time. Touching, to say the least.  
  
Then her deep lilac eyes trained onto Sakura again. "Besides, Sakura-chan, wasn't it  
you who was insisting that I 'felt something for Eriol'? What do you know - you were  
right, for once."  
Sakura's face went even paler, which shouldn't have been possible. And Syaoran  
instantly stepped in front of the cinnamon-haired girl. The words out of his mouth  
surprised everyone, including Tomoyo herself, although she didn't reveal it on the  
surface.  
  
"Daidouji-san, I don't want to hurt you. But if you try anything against Sakura, I  
swear I will."  
"Syaoran-kun!" Sakura exclaimed, and was about to tell him off some more when I  
cut in.  
  
"You're going to have a problem if you try to hurt Tomoyo, Li," I told him, finally letting  
the eternal coldness seep into my voice as I stepped defensively in front of Tomoyo.  
"A fair warning, right now."  
  
"Stop it, all of you, just stop it!" Sakura suddenly screamed.   
Tomoyo smirked at the other girl. "Uh-oh, she's finally getting a backbone," she  
mused.  
  
  
Sakura paid no attention to Tomoyo's snide comment, instead choosing to walk right  
up to her best friend.  
"Sakura, don't!" Syaoran told her quickly. "She's not the same person you knew-"  
Sakura completely ignored him as well. "Tomoyo-chan, please tell me you remember  
me?" she whispered.  
  
I was inclined to stepping in and intervening, but something told me to stay put and  
see where this all went. Maybe it was a mistake to listen to it; maybe it was a blessing,  
I was never really sure.   
  
Tomoyo opened her mouth, to make another rude remark no doubt, but then suddenly  
closed it and just stared into Sakura's evergreen eyes; perhaps because of the quiet  
sincerity in her voice, or the silent earnest of her expression. Or maybe she was finally  
remembering what she had once shared with this girl...  
...before I had taken it all away.  
  
"I admit I haven't known exactly what was going on these past few months," Sakura  
continued in a shaky voice. "But I have noticed that something's changed, don't think  
I haven't. You're my very best friend, Tomoyo-chan..."  
  
Now I decided to interrupt. "Heartfelt confession, Sakura-san," I said smoothly. "But  
we've got a mission to complete." Tomoyo seemed to snap out of some type of trance,  
and nodded slowly, turning to me. "Right..."  
  
Syaoran quickly pulled Sakura back, yanking out a few of his ofuda charms. "I think  
it's time we end this for good, Hiiragizawa, tonight," he said in a low tone.  
I shifted my staff in my hand. "I couldn't agree more, Li," I replied easily.   
  
Then it began. Using the same type of charm I had used on Syaoran earlier this   
morning, I pulled Sakura away from him so he wouldn't get hit at the same time; I  
wasn't a cheater. I wasn't going to strike them both at the same time. With a wave  
of my hand, I materialized a glowing, dagger-like object out of thin air, and sent it  
directly at Sakura. Both herself and my descendant were familiar with this weapon of  
mine, I had used it on them before. But of course, they had never had it hurled at  
them so quickly before, because I had been further away then. But I wanted to get  
this over with quickly; I was tiring of this scene.  
  
I know I shouldn't have acted so irrationally. For once in my life, I had let my guard  
off for an instant, and become blind to things around me, and it had become my   
biggest mistake ever. I should have paid attention...to the way Tomoyo had remained  
subdued since Sakura talked to her. I should have paid attention to the way she hadn't  
attacked Sakura right then when she'd had the chance. I should have paid attention  
to the recognition and the realization that suddenly ignited in her amethyst orbs as  
the large silver-glow shard flew straight for her closest friend...  
  
But I hadn't noticed it, and I only realized what must have happened hours later, even  
after it had already happened. Totally unlike me. But like I'd said, I hadn't been paying  
attention to the things around me. And also like I said...it was the worst thing I could  
ever have done...  
  
It all seemed to happen in slow motion, but it wasn't as if I would have been able to  
tell, because it was as if I had gone temporarily blind. I didn't register anything until  
I saw the love of my life, crumpling in front of Sakura, the dagger-like object only  
just disintegrating back into the nothingness it had come from, after puncturing her  
body...   
  
Tomoyo had taken the attack for Sakura.  
She remembered...part of my spell had worn off..  
  
"Tomoyo-chan!! Tomoyo-chan, no!"  
That was Sakura, already screaming as she cried hysterically, shaking her best friend  
in her arms. Syaoran was at their side that instant...it took much longer for me. I was  
still standing in numb shock...that wasn't even the right description for it. I felt so  
removed from it all, as if it were something I were watching on television. Because I  
just couldn't believe it was actually happening. It was only when I heard Ruby Moon's  
anguished wail from inside my mind, pushing against the numbness of my brain, that  
things slowly began to actually reconnect...  
  
Not even completely aware of what I was doing, I subconsciously told Ruby Moon and  
Spinel Sun to go home, to stay away from this place. Then I was running, I had dropped  
in front of Tomoyo's limp body, not seeing or noticing the way Syaoran was looking  
at me, or the way Sakura was almost literally being eaten away by grief inside out  
already. Not seeing anything but Tomoyo.  
  
She was so incredibly pale. I suppose that wouldn't describe much, because her  
complexion was a natural pale. But it wasn't the beautiful shade of pale I was so in  
love with, the snowy white complexion which smoothly and gently coated the sweetest  
essence of life within. It was the paleness of death...yet it still did nothing to daunt  
her never-ending beauty, her eternal peaceful will...but her eyes, her gorgeous liquid  
pools of shimmering amethyst were closed..  
  
I was still staring in numbed shock. Sakura gently placed her in my arms, and I crushed  
her body to mine, so very tightly. From what seemed to be far away, I suddenly heard  
her weak voice in my mind: "I'm sorry, Eriol. So sorry..."  
  
And then, burying my face in her long silken coils of hair, I did something I had never  
done in my life. Something I could only ever imagine doing for her.  
  
I cried.  
  
  
  
  
  
~*~*~  
  
  
  
  
("It's like putting a dove with a bat. You do realize which one will cancel the other out,  
right?")  
  
This time, I didn't even bother trying to block out the accusation, instead letting it  
run free through my mind and join the rest of the now-familiar 'I-told-you-so' chant.  
I was currently leaning against the wall directly outside of Sakura's bedroom two hours  
later, where Sakura had insisted we bring Tomoyo, considering her father was out of  
town on another archeological dig, and Touya was spending the night at Yukito's.  
Sakura herself was inside with Spinel's counterpart, Cerberus, who was attempting a  
weird combination of remaining calm while flipping out at the same time, as they  
tended to Tomoyo, who had long since slipped into a near-comatose state. Because  
of me...  
  
Just a few feet away, across the hall, Syaoran was leaning against the opposite wall,  
his eyes closed in seemingly deep concentration. Of course, I wasn't exactly in the  
state of mind to probe his thoughts. We had both been here in the same position for  
nearly two hours and counting, and not a word had been spoken. I don't know exactly  
what it was we were waiting for. The silence wasn't exactly a comfortable one, given  
what was going on, but it wasn't crackling tension, either. Still, I was waiting for him  
to come out and say it: he'd told me so, he'd known all along that I would be the one  
to kill her...  
  
My eyes, which had been shut, now squeezed closed even tighter, as a lightning hot  
stab of unbearable pain shot through my chest, straight to my head; as if I didn't have  
a big enough headache. The aches and pains had set in very quickly, as soon as the  
initial shock had worn away. I had never dreamed that emotional pain could turn   
physical this way...it hurt more than anything I had ever, and most likely would ever,  
feel in my incredibly long life. It was the kind of pain that shouldn't be inflicted on  
any creature under the sun. Yet it was just what I deserved. I deserved much, much  
worse than this. I deserved worse than death, but I was still on the verge of   
asking Syaoran to run his Li Clan sword through my heart. It was already trashed  
anyway; I could actually feel it crumbling, caving in -- my world was crumbling along  
with it. Because my world had been Tomoyo, but because of me, she was in Sakura's  
room, barely hanging onto a thread of life...and I had two choices now, neither of them  
really much of a choice. In fact, there was only one that I would ever choose, because  
the other wasn't ever an option, not now, not ever. I knew what I had to do. But the  
realization only made the pain more unbearable.  
  
"Hiiragzawa."  
I cringed inwardly, not caring if I visibly flinched at the sound of the voice. Here it  
came. He was finally going to chew me out on how it was all my fault. Well, I certainly  
hoped he wasn't expecting me to disagree with him.   
  
Syaoran opened his eyes, and I heard an audible sigh. Then, after a while, "She's  
going to be okay. She's recovering; I feel it in her aura."  
The words gave me tons of relief, but did zilch to ease the pain. I finally spoke as well  
a long time afterward, my voice hoarse. "How did she survive?"  
  
Syaoran was giving me a surprised look; I didn't even need to open my eyes, or  
sense his aura for that. "She has YOUR power in her," he pointed out the obvious  
answer. "And the attack came from you. You can't kill yourself completely from your  
own attacks, meaning you can't kill her, either."  
  
Of course I knew that, but I had to be in the worst state of mind possible. I shook my  
head, the pain methodically slashing tears into my soul. "I could have killed her," I  
whispered. "God...she could have died, I hurt her..I promised I would always make her  
happy, but I hurt her.."  
  
I didn't care if I had just revealed part of the source of my pain to Li Syaoran of all  
people...I just didn't care.  
Another sigh from Syaoran. "I think you knew inevitably that this was going to happen  
someday," he murmured. "You knew she couldn't survive forever with you."  
  
In other words: I told you so. I was surprised, though, that he was actually making an  
effort to break it in one of the nicest ways possible...still, that's what it all came down  
to. I crumbled even more, collapsing further against the wall.  
  
("It's like putting a dove with a bat. You do realize which one will cancel the other out,  
right?")  
  
Tomoyo...  
She didn't deserve any of this. I could think of no one in history who deserved this  
less than my Tomoyo...I once again thought of how much, how deeply I loved her..  
"I love her so much." I didn't even realize I had choked the words out. But it was too  
late to stop them anyway. "I've never felt this way before, but she's everything to me..."  
  
Syaoran was quiet for a while, and then, "I know."  
Now I was slightly surprised, only slightly however -- nothing was really managing to  
shake off the guilt, the pain.  
Syaoran continued. "It's obvious enough, Hiiragizawa, anyone with eyes or ears can  
tell you love her...and yeah, that she feels the exact same way, if not more." Here he  
paused in hesitation, and I knew what caused it; it took a LOT for a Li to admit they  
were wrong. "At first I thought you'd just cast a spell on her. I never doubted that  
you loved her; why else would you enchant her? But it's obvious to see that she is  
happy with you...you make her happy in a way that only Sakura's ever been able to  
do."  
  
He broke off again, then sighed. "That's why even I can admit that this is awful. 'Cause  
you know that you two just can't survive together -- it's like I said before, about the  
dove and the bat. The angel and the demon -- no offense. Fate just never meant for you  
to be together... and if you keep going against that law, this is just going to happen  
again...but it'll be worse next time. Fate has a way of screwing people like that."  
  
I groaned, shaking my head again as I finally opened my eyes. "Tell me about it," I  
muttered quietly. "I know what I have to do."  
The resolve was there, but it was like resigning myself to a fate worse than death. In  
a way, that was exactly what I was doing. To live a life without her...death would be  
so much better, because I was positive that I just couldn't LIVE without her...  
  
...but I was going to have to. Because I would never, ever let her get hurt again, and  
if being with me was going to cause her pain...then so be it.  
I'd let her go...  
  
After what seemed like eons, Sakura's bedroom door flew open, and she bounced out,  
clutching Kero in her hand, who wasn't too pleased to see me, but still kept his temper  
in check because I WAS his creator, after all. In some form.  
  
"She's okay!" Sakura announced in a weary, but glowingly relieved and satisfied tone.  
"I gave her some of my power, so she could recover..." At these words, I noticed  
Syaoran's measuring look shift to one of concern, and I had to hide a sad smirk.  
  
The emerald-eyed girl turned to face me with a smile, a smile that was oddly bright  
and trusting, despite everything that had gone down tonight. "She should wake up  
any time now, Eriol-kun, since I gave her a lot of my power. And before you say   
anything, Syaoran-kun," she added quickly, as Syaoran was about to jump on her  
for the admission. "I was extra careful not to use up too much of my magic. That's  
why she's still gonna be tired."  
  
I nodded quietly, turning to the door. "I'm gonna go speak to her," I said.  
Sakura gave me a look. "Eriol-kun, are you sure?" she said, a bit more subduedly.   
I shrugged, once again feeling removed, as if I had fallen away from myself. "I've  
got to tell her goodbye sometime, don't I?" I murmured in almost a monotone.  
Syaoran's eyes filled with understanding, something I'd never expected to see in them,  
especially directed toward me.  
  
Sakura's jaw dropped open, however, and she looked from me to Syaoran in rapid  
succession. "What?" she cried, then remembered her best friend behind the closed  
door and lowered her voice. "Eriol-kun, you're going to leave?" Her voice dripped with  
incredulity.  
  
"Yes Sakura-san," I told her simply. "Tonight. I'm going back to England." The words  
were so hard to say...to think of going anywhere without her...but they were out, and  
I was sticking to them. I sent a mental message to Spinel and Nakuru to get ready  
and start packing.  
  
"But Eriol-kun!" she wailed. "I'll miss you! And besides, you can't just leave Tomoyo-  
chan, she'll be crushed! I don't exactly agree with what you did to her so that you  
two could be together, but I've seriously never seen Tomoyo-chan so happy, even if  
she was evil at the same time. You two are so in love with each other..."  
  
Syaoran put a restraining hand on her arm, as I closed my eyes, shaking my head  
against her innocence - the only other one who could compare to Tomoyo. Of course,  
there was innocence and there was naivete.  
  
"That's exactly it, Sakura-san," I murmured. "I love her. And I won't let her get hurt  
because of me, ever again." I paused, then glanced at Syaoran. "You explain to your  
girlfriend later, okay? I've got my mind made up."  
Syaoran must have really been deep in thought; he didn't even react to my original  
comment. He nodded. "You're doing the right thing, Hiiragizawa, even if you've never  
done the right thing before."  
  
I walked through the door, leaving the discussion of the other three outside as the  
room adopted a mute quality.  
And there she was on the bed, her eyes still closed in a deep sleep, but she wasn't in  
a coma, I could tell that at once. Indeed, she looked almost the way she had just last  
night when she'd been asleep in my arms...when I'd just wanted things to remain the  
way they were then. When I'd just wanted to give up forever, just for me to be with  
her.  
  
Damned delusional thoughts.  
  
Her hair was spread around her like a dark purple halo, creating even more of a  
fallen angel image against the ivory pale of her skin. My fallen angel...  
The angel of a demon. Irony sucked big time.  
  
Reassurance calmed me down to a state of quiet acceptance and relief, as I saw her  
chest rising and falling gently, proof that she was breathing easily, in a dreaming  
state. And yeah, I briefly wondered what it was she was dreaming about...but as long  
as she wasn't having nightmares, then I was happy.  
  
Taking her hand, I leaned over and gave her a soft kiss...and as I did so, concentrating  
with all my energy...I called back every last spore of darkness I had infested her with,  
sweeping her soul and her aura clean again. Clean and pure...she was an angel of God  
again, just like she was meant to be. THE angel of God.  
And I was really happy then, knowing that she was an angel both inside and out...again.  
  
I had to have been concentrating very hard, since I didn't notice when she returned  
to consciousness until I heard her voice. "Eriol..."  
It still sent shivers down my spine, only this time accompanied with a hollowed ache,  
Knowing that this was probably the last time I'd ever hear her say my name.  
  
I gave her a gentle smile, pushing the rebel strands of her hair away. "Hey," I said  
softly. "How do you feel?"  
No doubt she was about to open her mouth to respond with the standard "I'm fine",  
but then paused to consider. "Actually, I feel kind of...different," she said.  
I nodded. "I took the spell off of you. You're not evil anymore."  
  
Tomoyo stared at me, seeming to realize the seriousness in the situation. "Eriol, you  
were never evil," she declared gently. "Except maybe when you sat in that chair of  
yours, maybe, but-"  
I chuckled lightly, then shook my head, caressing the dark violet strands away from  
her forehead. "I was evil," I told her. "Compared to you, I'm Satan himself." I paused,  
then sighed with a smile. "You're a goddess, Tomoyo."   
  
"Are you sweet-talking me again?" Tomoyo asked in a teasingly suspicious voice. I  
smirked, I couldn't help it. "You're already too sweet to do that," I replied flippantly.  
She rolled her eyes. "Well, thanks for answering my question." Then she paused, and  
her eyes got somber again. "I'm sorry, Eriol," she murmured, glancing away. "I know  
I must have really messed things up tonight. But...I just couldn't let Sakura-chan get  
hurt, there was something in my mind that kept saying that I couldn't let her get  
hurt--"  
  
I nodded again. "You got your memory back -- the spell didn't last through the strong  
friendship you've got with Sakura. And I'm glad too...I never should have tainted you.  
You were never meant to be evil, you're an angel...an angel of purity and sincerity..."  
I suddenly broke off and crushed her to me for what had to be the sixth time in two  
days. This hurt so much...to be with her right now, and then know I would probably  
never see her again...  
  
Despite not having my powers anymore, Tomoyo somehow was still able to see what  
I was thinking; I guess it wasn't a gift I had given her after all.  
"Eriol," she whispered suddenly, taking my hand. "No matter what you believe, I really  
do love you."  
  
I clenched my eyes shut with a sigh -- as if the fates weren't already being cruel   
enough, they just had to make things all the more harder, didn't they? I had been  
all prepared to leave, to separate from Tomoyo because I couldn't risk hurting her  
again...I had never given much thought to the fact that she might be hurt anyway if  
I left. Of course, I had known she would feel terrible, but...  
  
It was another one of those lose/lose situations. And I couldn't describe how much  
I hated those situations. But there was only one thing I could do, that I would permit  
myself to do.  
  
I glanced away from those violet depths. "I lied Tomoyo," I murmured. "I think you  
were attracted to me because of my power."  
Tomoyo shook her head. "No, you're only lying now. I know that for a fact because  
the reasons I'm in love with you can't possibly have anything to do with your power.  
Well, maybe remotely, but still. It's not about what you do, Eriol. I care about you for  
who YOU are, underneath all that."  
  
The words were touching; she seemed to have a way with touching my heart that  
way. Tears were threatening to build up for the second time that night; I firmly pushed  
them away. There was no way I could show weakness, or I would never be able to  
leave her side.   
  
I involuntarily let out a pained sigh as I knelt at her bedside again. The pain was only  
intensified by similar emotions reflected in Tomoyo's eyes.  
"Tomoyo, you realize what I'm doing, don't you?" I asked quietly.  
Tears sprang to her eyes, and she nodded. "You say we can't be together because  
you're a devil and I'm an angel...you're leaving."  
  
"Tomoyo, I honestly don't want to go," I whispered brokenly, not caring if my defenses  
were breaking down. As long as my resolve stayed strong...but even that was in danger  
of crumbling like a sand castle in the tide. She had some power of her own, in those  
amethyst pools of hers. "I'd give anything just to stay with you...but I know that if I  
do, I'll end up hurting you again, maybe even worse than this time...and I just couldn't  
live with myself if I did that, Tomoyo."  
  
"But it was my choice, Eriol," Tomoyo protested. "I was the one who jumped in front  
of Sakura when you attacked!"  
"Don't you understand, Tomoyo?" I countered weakly. "You did that because part of  
your real self was showing through...the part that cares about Sakura. The angel in  
you made you do that, and if you look at it, it would have been a no-win situation.  
If you hadn't gotten in the way, and Sakura had been killed, your real self would have  
killed you eventually with guilt. And now, you've got proof that your angel side can't  
mix with the devil in me..."  
  
Tears were now running in streams down her pale cheeks. "I love you, Eriol."  
My own tears were back again, springing to my eyes, though I would not let them go  
any further than that. "I love you too, Tomoyo," I whispered. "More than anything.  
That's why I'm doing this; I can't bear to see you hurt because of me again. I have  
to leave." I gently kissed her tears away as they started to run faster. "It would be  
better if you forgot about me."  
  
Tomoyo shook her head, her eyes still locked with mine. "Never," she breathed.  
I gave a small, rueful smile. "I might have to make you."  
"You'd never be able to make me do that, even with all your fancy spells."  
I shook my head with a little chuckle. That died away quickly. "I'm sorry Tomoyo. I  
love you."  
  
Then I held up my hand, and a blue light began emitting from it. Then I swept it over  
Tomoyo's head, and she fell into another sleep. I felt a sharp ache in my heart as her  
head fell limply to the side, already fast asleep. Cancelling the blue light, I stroked her  
face gently. Then I conjured up a plum blossom - the flower I had given her the day  
I had made her into something like me. A mistake that would forever go down as one  
of my worst.  
  
I placed the plum blossom on her chest, and then kissed her hand. "Goodbye, Tomoyo."  
  
And then I simply teleported out of the house, and walked off into the night.  
  
  
  
  
~Normal POV~  
  
  
  
  
The girl slowly woke up, hearing voices outside the door. Familiar voices...voices of  
friends, friends she hadn't had any real contact with in what seemed to be ages.  
  
She was disoriented, blinking up at the ceiling a few times in confusion, wondering  
just what had happened. She was sure that she had woken up before, in almost this  
very same position, with a few differences however...  
  
Then the memory came flooding back, and she gasped, bolting into a sitting position  
as she searched around wildly for HIM. Something was a little strange for her; she   
had been sure he'd said he would erase her memory, so then why did she still   
remember him? But of course, she wasn't exactly complaining..  
  
Was he already gone...?  
  
Something light and delicate fluttered to the bedsheets in the corner of her eye, and  
she turned in curiousity. Something light coloured, small, violet...  
She gasped as she picked up the flower -- a plum blossom.  
Like the plum blossom he had given her before, in a time that now seemed so long  
ago...   
  
Suddenly, indefinetly, she knew that he was gone.  
  
The plum blossom rested light and airy and fluttery in the pale hands of the girl, until  
the petals were suddenly hit hard and burdened down with something...a single,  
crystalline teardrop. The sign of the shattered heart.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
'Cause when you are with me  
I'm free, I'm careless  
I believe  
Above all the others  
We'll fly   
  
This brings tears, to my eyes  
My sacrifice  
  
  
~Creed - My Sacrifice  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
**backs away** Okay, please don't kill me for ending it like that, but that's really the  
only way I could think of to end it. I know, not much of a sequel...but then again, I  
hoped you enjoyed it anyway. Like before, email me at starviewcom@hotmail.com  
for comments, etc.   
  
  
  
~FIN 


End file.
